From Broke to Betrothed

Jordan: Some of the topics discussed in this episode may be triggering to some listeners. To see what they are, check out the description below. Now all of that in haiku. Take it away, Lauren. 

Lauran: Topics Deep Ahead Health Divorce And mental strain. Jokes and puns remain. With a deep breath, you step back and allow Egbert's energy to flow freely.

The harmonic hum intensifies, vibrating the air around you as the garden pulses with light. Suddenly, there's a loud crack. The ground beneath Egbert shifts, and slowly, oh so slowly, Egbert's shell begins to splinter. As you watch in awe, the pieces of the shell fall away, revealing

Ugh, I keep bumping my mic. Make sure you try not to bump it because I'm terrible. Okay. 

Jordan: Nope. Why I want to I want to get up close and personal My mic likes me. Hi buddy. We're 

Lauran: about to get up close and personal 

Jordan: and why is that 

Lauran: because hi everybody We're so excited because we finally we've been working on this project for a while now 

Jordan: and it has been a minute So I'm just really excited.

This is finally we're finally recording episode 

Lauran: Episode uno, what is our new podcast called, Jordan? 

Jordan: We 

are 

Lauran: fine. We're fine. 

Jordan: We're fine. 

Lauran: We're fine. We're fine. And when you think of that, um, I immediately think of like the dog meme in a dumpster fire that is life. 

Jordan: Absolutely. I think of, you know what I think of?

I think of something a little different. I think of raccoons and opossums. Live fast, eat trash, baby. 

Lauran: Anywho, welcome to our new podcast. We're so excited to have you guys here where we are going to dive into all things, uh, Relationships and education and just the laughing through all of the chaos that is life.

Jordan: Because trust us, we have plenty of experience with that. 

Lauran: Honestly, too much experience with that. 

Jordan: Yeah, so um. More than 

Lauran: my comfort level of experience with that. But I think what's, what's going to be awesome about this is that we are able to share Our experience is, you know, in life, laughing through the tragedies with you guys, and then kind of, we can all kind of commiserate together and feel sorry for each other.

Jordan: Yeah, and speaking of that, you know, looking towards the future with this show, we're excited, we're gonna have guests coming on, speaking with their stories, telling us their, the highs and lows of their life, and you know, what, what's that one moment that you look back on, and when you were living it, it was just the worst moment, but now you can't help but laugh because of how crazy life can be sometimes.

Definitely. 

Lauran: So I think this would be a good place to kind of talk about who we are, because for some of you, this is the first time you're meeting us. So welcome. 

Jordan: Hi strangers. How's it going? Not 

Lauran: strangers. Now they're friends. Oh, 

Jordan: I'm sorry. I didn't know they were friends now. So I, I think they're more acquaintances, not friends.

We're not really there yet. But you know, by the end of this episode, we're going to be BFFs. Trust me. 

Lauran: Jordan's the logical one, if you couldn't tell. Anywho, um, so I'm Lauren Woolley. I am known as Mrs. Woolley and 5th on all of my social media platforms, TikTok, Instagram, you name it, I'm there. Um, so I started back in 2020, uh, right around the time Has it been that long since COVID?

It's been that long, unfortunately. It feels like just yesterday, but, um, I started back in 2020 making content for, you know, my students just to help them, like, laugh at what being a teacher was like and, you know, talking about what my day to day life looked like and it kind of just evolved from there and became this awesome project that I've been working on for five years.

I do 

Jordan: think, to be honest here, let's, let's be honest with the group. Be 

Lauran: honest, please. 

Jordan: I think you're brushing over the whole starting up a bet with one of your students. 

Lauran: That is true. I 

Jordan: think you should. At least mention that, that your whole rise to your, like, internet career was because you decided to bet a child you can get more followers than them.

Lauran: Okay, well, like, this student that I had was, he was struggling in one of my co teacher's classes, and I found out that he really liked TikTok, and so I had never been on TikTok, I never posted really anything on social media. Listen, okay, I know, 

Theme: I 

Lauran: know, okay, I, listen, I lived under a rock for a while, guys, it's okay.

For a while? For the majority of my life. Anywho, um, so I bet him that I could get more followers than he could by the end of the year, and then COVID hit. So we all were in quarantine, I had way too much time on my hands, made too many videos that I look back on and cringe at, but it's fine. Um, but it got him to come to class every week during our virtual meets, so it kinda worked out.

Jordan: I think that's great. 

Lauran: I love it. We are obviously, you know, I I I've been on the internet, but Jordan, this is all new to you. 

Jordan: Yeah, I, um, well, I wouldn't say the internet's new to me. That would be 

Lauran: First of all, 

Jordan: who are you? I am Jordan Woolley. So I have been, I've had the honor of being married to you since 2018.

Two years before you decided to bet children that you could, uh, rise to the charts of celebrity on the internet. 

Lauran: Stop saying it like that. I definitely didn't do that. 

Jordan: I don't know. I think that's what happened. I was just trying 

Lauran: to get this kid to come to class. Okay. Yeah. 

Jordan: So, no, I think. I think it worked out for both of you.

He came to class, he got an education, and you have a platform of almost 8 million followers now. So, I mean, one of you did win a little bit more than the other, but I'm dying grass here at that point. Yeah, you're dying 

Lauran: grass. You're dying grass. 

Jordan: No, so yeah, um. 

Lauran: But I think one of the funniest stories that we can tell to kind of help them get to know us a little bit more.

Theme: Okay. 

Lauran: is the story of the beginning of our entire marriage, which was our engagement and how perfect because the day this is coming out is actually the anniversary of our engagement. So special, so do you want to tell it or do you want me to tell it? 

Jordan: I think I have to tell it. 

Lauran: I think you do. 

Jordan: And? 

Lauran: I think you should start all the way from October of 2016, that was when you were going to and you didn't.

Oh, 

Jordan: I have to tell that. That part's sad though. 

Lauran: Nah, it's not. I mean, it's part of the show, we laugh at our tragedies. 

Jordan: We'll go through it. I'm okay with you 

Lauran: telling it. 

Jordan: Okay. No, that makes sense. It's my sad 

Lauran: story. 

Jordan: Yeah, but you know, now I feel like. You know, I just met these people. We're getting past that strangers.

We're moving through the acquaintance stage. And we're just 

Lauran: gonna dive right in. And I'm gonna 

Jordan: dive into this story that makes me sound like a complete and total jerk. 

Lauran: No, it doesn't. It doesn't. I don't know. 

Jordan: Well, okay, we're gonna tell it. So, we had been, like, Dating for a while and in October of 2016, you know, I was getting brave.

I was getting up that courage and I was like, I'm going to ask her to marry me. And I had the bright idea because I am anxious and I don't want to do anything wrong. I'm like, Hey, Lauren, Do you want to go to the jewelers with me? So she's like, yes, of course, she's like, yes, like she knows what's coming out of this and We first go to a local jeweler And that was 

Lauran: pause.

I gotta put some context on this I gotta put some context on this because at this point in time I was a first year teacher and all of my first year teacher friends out there know We make nothing in the first year that we are teaching, and on top of already having like a pretty low salary, I'm talking like I was making like 30, 000 a year, um, you know, before taxes, I also was accidentally putting way too much money into my retirement fund, so I literally did not have any money, so we were broke as a joke at this 

Jordan: point.

I was about to say, you're defending yourselves. I would also like to make my case here and say that, I was still in college. That's true. I had no income except for my job at the gas station. 

Lauran: You were, you were getting paid for an internship, 

Jordan: a little. Oh yeah, I was at that time, wasn't I? 

Lauran: It was 

Jordan: not that much.

It was minimum wage too. That's true. So we go to the local jeweler, we're looking at all of these just beautiful hand cut diamonds, like, stuff that, like, it's in magazines and movies. Like, I'm just like Wow, like this stuff looks beautiful. And they were like, yeah, so we never stood a chance. So they're like, yeah, do you like this band and everything?

And they keep saying band, band, band. And I was just like, yeah, I like the ring. And then you're finally settled on a band. 

Lauran: I forgot about this part. 

Jordan: And they're like, okay, well, That costs like, what was it, like 8, 000. 

Lauran: Yeah, something around there. 

Jordan: And then they're like, are you ready to pick out the diamond?

Lauran: Yeah, cuz I had never known that like, you have to, well sometimes, you can buy some rings that are like already put together. I think 

Jordan: with very fancy jewelers, this is how this works, but not for me. 

Lauran: But I didn't know that. I didn't know that there were like, you know, you had to actually select the rock that you put on the ring.

You know, 

Jordan: I hear so many people complaining about how we need to teach like financial literacy schools. I think everybody should go through a course on how to pick out an engagement ring because they do not teach you that. 

Lauran: Well, as Michael Scott said, three month salary or three year salary, right? Yeah, that's 

Jordan: what it felt like in the moment.

It really did. So we're sitting there. They say, Oh, well now it's time to pick out the diamond. And I was like, wait, I thought we picked out the ring. And I'm like, no, no. Now you get the honor of choosing your beautiful diamond. That's going to cost you another. 8, 000. 

Lauran: No, you're forgetting. 

Jordan: Wait, I'm forgetting something?

They literally, 

Lauran: no, they literally went into a safe. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. And they brought out, they brought out this first bag of diamonds, which was like the normal average, you know, everyday person is going to pick this diamond, bag of diamonds. And then they brought out the, like, 

Jordan: the Leo Select line. Yes. 

Lauran: Yes, and it was like this, they brought out this giant case, and this rock, I'm telling you, was like three carats.

Do you remember they 

Jordan: came with, they had the security guard come over, too, because they had a, like, a security person in the store, and he came over when they brought that over. But 

Lauran: they don't tell you the price or anything, so like, they just walk it over, and they like, put it on your hand, and make you all excited and happy about your ring and stuff, and then they go And then 

Jordan: they use scientific terms, like, there are no inclusions.

This is an EFD level two, grade 37 diamond, and I'm sitting there like, this sounds crazy. Amazing. Give me that diamond. All right. Your firstborn child, please. 

Lauran: Right, because they literally, they, we asked how much it cost and the diamond alone was twelve thousand dollars. Just the rock. So the ring all together was going to be twenty grand.

What, 

Jordan: you know, I'm posing this and I want, I want, I want our, our, the community out here, our, our new acquaintances, our new friends here. Which 

Lauran: also, come up with a name for yourselves because I don't, what do we call you? 

Jordan: No, so I want, I want you guys, those of you, I'm looking at you who are jewelers, Like, come on, is this a game to you?

Like, I want, I do, I want to know, because I looked like a college kid. I had scraggly long hair, I was in a band tee and ripped jeans, and just destroyed vans. You knew I didn't have, like, 40 grand for a ring. Listen, 

Lauran: you could have, like, Pretty womaned them and been like, like gone in in your band tee and your ripped jeans and then what if they, you know, judged you based on how you looked and didn't sell you that diamond and then you walked out of the store and were like, big mistake, huge.

I actually am a millionaire, which we're not, but 

Jordan: Do you, do you know me? Even if I had that capability, I would, I would not, I would walk in there like, you don't belong in here, like, you know what, sir? You know what, ma'am? I don't belong here. 

Lauran: We feel like that everywhere we go. We've tried to go to so many different, like, fancy restaurants and stuff, and we just feel so out 

Jordan: of place.

So, to continue with this story, because it's just, it's going to be ups and downs here, so we're getting ready for a down. So 

Lauran: a big down. 

Jordan: So we go home and then eventually I get the feeling of what Lauren's looking for, for a diamond ring of death. A diamond ring of death? I'm getting the feel for what Lauren's looking for in like her engagement ring.

So me and my mom then go to Kay Jewelers and we eventually pick out this ring. It's something with an affordable monthly payment for a college student. And it's beautiful. I love it. It's also not very expensive. I mean, 

Lauran: it was expensive 

Jordan: for 

Lauran: what we could afford. Not much when 

Jordan: you're a college student. I don't care.

Lauran: I love it. It's pretty. That's all that matters. So, 

Jordan: we picked it out. I'm super excited. Um, autumn and fall and October and all of that is like our favorite time of year. I make plans for Lauren, I forget where we went, because we still ended up going, but I make plans, I'm like, this is going to be the day, I'm going to ask her to marry me, I'm getting super excited, and I get home from classes.

And you are bawling, and I'm like, oh no, something's wrong. And I ask you, I'm like, so, so what's going on, like, you're really upset, what's going on? And you're like, hey, I just want, I just want to let you know, my parents are getting divorced. 

Lauran: Who have been together for like 25 years. 

Jordan: And I'm like, oh, 

Lauran: bad 

Jordan: time.

Lauran: I guess I'll wait then. Yeah. So long story short, he didn't end up actually proposing to me in October as he planned. He proposed to me on December 4th. 

Jordan: December 4th. 

Lauran: Yes. 

Jordan: So. 

Lauran: So that's the fun part of us picking out our ring and, you know. We'll have to tell the actual engagement story, like the proposal, another time, because this is a funny story as well.

Jordan: Oh my gosh. But we could honestly 

Lauran: drone on about our engagement all day long. I was 

Jordan: about to say, do we have to have a part two for the engagement? We have to have 

Lauran: engagement part two. 

Jordan: Okay. The engaging. 

Lauran: The Engagening. 

Jordan: Electric Engage a loo. 

Lauran: You're gonna, you're gonna get a lot of pop culture references from us.

You could say. We're nerds and we follow like the same five shows. Yeah. Constantly. 

Jordan: So. 

Lauran: We live in memes. 

Jordan: Alright. 

Lauran: So I hope you're prepared guys. Speaking of highs and lows, this brings us to another segment we're gonna have in our show where we talk about highs and lows of the month. So like you want to start us off.

Jordan: Oh, I'm gonna start us off. I feel like I've been no, you know I feel like I've been talking the majority right now. So I'm gonna give it to you. It's your turn Okay, take the lead here. So, 

Lauran: okay. Um, so what do we want to start with? You wanna start with highs or lows? Let's 

Jordan: go low. Let's go low and bring it up high.

Lauran: We're gonna go low and then go high. 

Jordan: Yeah, 

Lauran: we 

Jordan: go low So everybody else can go high. And then we go high. And then we go high. 

Lauran: Okay. So, um, I hate to bring it down to like, after we had that fun story of my parents getting divorced, uh, but I hate to bring it down to here. But, um, all right. So my low for the month, one of my lows for the month was, so, um, obviously we've been married since 2018.

So we're going on, or no, we, we've been married for six years. 

Theme: Yeah. 

Lauran: Yeah. So that's math. Yeah, that is math. Six years being married. And, um, you know, we have, we have kicked this can down the road about a thousand million times. Um, but 

Jordan: we started off by punting it first. 

Lauran: Oh, we launched it down the road. I'm pretty sure when we got married, your mother was like, So, baby?

Like, when are we gonna have a baby now? And not in, like, an intrusive way at all. Like, she is very respectful of, like, our decisions and everything. It's just kinda like, she's excited to be a grandma. 

Jordan: Oh, yeah. She's really excited. 

Lauran: And so is my mom. So, we, we weren't ready, though. Obviously, when we got married, we were young.

We were 24. And, you know, we, we weren't ready to have a kid. So we rocket launched that can down the road. Um, and now that, you know, I just turned 30 and you're 31, I feel like we are now in a place where, you know, our, our careers are established. No, I was going to 

Jordan: say, as much as we joke about rocket launching, you know, for, for us and for our situation and for our life, I think that was a good decision.

I think we both have grown so much. We both experienced so much that have made us. I know I'm speaking for myself here. I am not the mess, the dumpster fire that I was when I was 25 years old. So no, you weren't 

Lauran: the trash bandicoot that you were. I was 

Jordan: not trash bandicoot. So 

Lauran: I agree. I think, I think we've definitely matured a lot.

I think 

Jordan: everybody's like life Journey in their stories. It's all different. And if it works for you, it works for you. And I just, you know, I, I look on our journey. I think like, no, I think we made a good decision. 

Lauran: We made the best decision for us, right? Because absolutely, you know, everybody should make the best decision for themselves.

Yeah, 

Jordan: absolutely. 

Lauran: So yeah, we did that for ourselves and we just weren't ready at the time. Um, we've always kind of toyed with the idea back and forth, um, of when that would be. Um, but I feel like, you know, we both kind of, you know, Landed on 30. Yeah. And you know, we, we lived through, you know, being married all through our 20s, which honestly for me, I really liked taking that time to like get to know one another a bit more.

And also to learn how to live with someone else. Because I, I lived in my house, like my family home until I was married and I, Okay. Had never lived in like, you know, I didn't go out, I didn't go to college out of state or anything or, you know, out of town. So I, I lived at home all through college. I never had that experience of living with other people.

So like, we took a lot of time to learn about that and, you know, just. I feel like we, we worked a lot because we both are huge advocates for like mental health and we both go to therapy so like through therapy and doing like some couples therapy here and there we've been able to like talk about things that we want to, you know, really make the Um, positives in our relationship.

And so we finally feel like we're at that point where this is the time, like we're, we're ready to go. So we started the process of like trying to start a family in August of this year. Um, so it's, it hasn't been very long. It's only been a few months, but I think the low for me for this month was just getting another negative pregnancy test.

Just because like. I don't know, I try to put on a front and act like it doesn't bother me. 

Jordan: I, I'm gonna stop you right there, because, hold on, your front, I'm not saying, you are absolutely valid in your feelings and everything you've experienced with this so far, and I don't want to take that from you, and I also don't want to make you feel like you have to put on a front.

You don't, by the way. No, I know, I'm just saying. I just want to make sure like I'm validating you there, but I also want to say I know why you're putting on a front. I just want to say you are bad at it. 

Lauran: Listen, I wear my heart on my sleeve. I've said this a million times. You're coming home. 

Jordan: Your eyes are puffy.

I'm sorry, not you're coming. I'm coming home. Your eyes are puffy. You're still crying. Like there are still tears. You're sniffling. It is obvious you are upset. And like, Like, the pregnancy test is on, like, the table, like, in eyesight, you meant to throw it away, you didn't throw it away, and I'm like, what's wrong, and you're like, nothing, nothing is wrong, and I'm like, Lauren, there's obviously something wrong right now, 

Lauran: I know, but like, I, like, I guess from my perspective, like, I think of it as this, and, and, And like you said, I'm valid in my feelings, but I also try to put myself in the perspective of other people.

And I know that there are, are, you know, men and women and, you know, just families out there in general that are like hoping and praying for a child, whatever, whatever way that comes, and have been hoping and praying for much longer than me. That's what I was gonna 

Jordan: say. Yeah. So that's why it almost feels 

Lauran: invalid, but even though it's not, you know?

Jordan: Yeah. 

Lauran: So. I guess I try to stay positive and like, you know, it's normal for it to take a while and I don't think people talk about that enough. 

Jordan: No, I, cause I know, cause I brought it up to my boss at work and I like let her know we started this journey and everything and I feel like it's not. Like I know, Um, she, she told me how long it took, and like, it's like, oh, wow, like, it took, it took them a minute to have their first child and everything, so it, and I know, like you said, like, but it still stings.

I don't know if it just triggers 

Lauran: something in me, like, from like, you know, from my perspective, I don't know if it just triggers something in me, like, I'm like, you know, why isn't it working? Like, it's supposed to happen, you know? And it just makes you think and then your brain gets all foggy with the anxiety of it not, you know, not going to happen.

Jordan: Well, I mean, like you touched on, we both go to therapy, we both deal with things like anxiety and depression and everything and I think that it's, It's a pretty easy trigger for what has gone on in your past and everything to make you feel that way in, in your journey. So I don't think that's, I know, I know, like you said, like, yeah, it takes time and everything.

And we're like, this has only been like month two of the journey. And there's been people who've gone on so much longer and have done with dealt with so much more. But you're still like, yeah, Don't discount your own. It's okay that I feel that way. Yeah, don't discount your disappointment. 

Lauran: Right, but, um, I just want to say, like anyone else going through that journey of, you know, hoping to start a family, whether that's through adoption or surrogacy or, you know, just, you know, IVF, whatever means you're trying to start your family, um, you know, I'm sending all the good vibes and all the baby dust your way because that's where we're at and we're Hoping for, you know, not another negative test this upcoming month.

So that was my low for the month. What about you? 

Jordan: Um, well, I feel like my low was not as, like, deep as yours. 

Lauran: That's okay, though. We don't need to go super 

Jordan: deep every time. We don't need to, like, trauma race here. Yeah, no, it's not a race. Um, no, I think my low this month was definitely having bronchitis. Okay.

So, you know, I've been doing a lot of research on this. After not being sick for almost like four years. Well, I should say not being sick with upper respiratory. Because there was the whole two years of dealing with an ulcerative colitis flare. That was not fun. But that's a whole story in itself. But yeah, no, it's, it was really rough because, you know, I, I, I get, like, really anxious about, like, getting sick.

I, having, like, being diagnosed at a young age with ulcerative colitis and going through that all has, like, really given me, like, just really bad, um, knee jerk reactions to any time I get sick. And you've experienced that a lot, where I can have the sniffles and I'm like, I am dying today. 

Lauran: You have medical anxiety.

Yeah, yeah, I know. Anything medical. 

Jordan: But I remember it was what, it was the second day of dealing with it, and you're like, before I had gone to bed that night, you're like, you need to go to the doctor. I was like, I'll be fine. I'm gonna, I'll show you who needs a doctor. 

Lauran: Yeah, um, Jordan never listens to me, to the, almost to the point, like, okay, years ago, when he did go through that colitis bout, um, he literally was like making himself sick, staying at home.

I had to drag him to the hospital to get him IV fluids. I was like, dude, You need to go. And I, I like fought him on this for like weeks and finally he let me take him. 

Jordan: To touch on that story, I knew it was bad when my gastro showed up at the hospital and was like, you need to put him in a bed now. Yeah.

And this was 

Lauran: like peak COVID when the hospitals were like rampant. It was like impossible to get in like through the emergency room. So he, yeah, we had to get like special authorization from the doctor who physically had to come to the hospital and be like, now, like IVs, like, it was not good. So when Jordan gets sick, because, is it okay that I tell this?

Yeah, go ahead. Okay, because he has an autoimmune disorder, he gets like 10 times as sick as somebody else. Like, so I had the same bronchitis that he had a few weeks earlier, and it made me, it maybe took me out for like, a couple days and I wouldn't even say took me out like I was sick for a few days and I had like a lingering cough but You were like down for the count for an entire week.

Jordan: I like how now you're able to tell when I'm like truly like, oh, he's on death's door sick is because I have this, like, I don't know what it is. Don't say death's door. I don't know what it, that is my expression. I will use it. Um, I don't know what it is, but I have this just like coping mechanism when I'm sick of I'm just going to curl up in a ball and just have this insanely hot shower.

And I remember the one day I was doing that And you knock on the door, you open it up, you look down because I'm in a ball on the floor of the shower, and I'm like Oh, you're not okay. 

Lauran: Yeah, you're not good. So that was your low for the month. 

Jordan: I think that was pretty rough. It was. Well, the waking up at 2 a.

1. on the second night coughing up blood is also not fun. Yeah, I'm 

Lauran: glad you went to the doctor and got medicine. So maybe next time you'll listen to me. Hey, doctors out there, 

Jordan: thank you. I'm alive because of you. 

Lauran: That is true. All right, so on to the high points of our fun 

Jordan: stuff. 

Lauran: Yes, because, you know. We go low and then we go high.

So, um, my high point for the month, and I think this is kind of for a little bit for both of us, was, um, so we're starting a small business, um, and we're trying to, you know, develop our business on the side of also working full time, and we've been putting in a lot of work. Yeah, and, and now doing this for all of you guys.

Yeah. Um, We've been putting in a lot of work, um, and obviously it, it's not, you know, up and running yet, so we don't make money off of it or anything, it's just kind of like a passion project right now. It's a 

Jordan: lot of, like, sleepless nights for no pay, which is so much fun, I mean, I love doing a ton of work for no pay.

Lauran: I do, I am very grateful though that we have the opportunity to do this, and like, you know, we're We're at a point where we, we can, you know, so, um, our business, uh, we, we're a company that we're partnered with like a local business incubator and they have this event every year that is like their shark tank, so not the actual show, but an event where they pick, you know, five companies to pitch their project and you can win prize money for the company.

Um, and we got selected to pitch and I know, we were so excited because we're, we're literally in like the infant stage of our company. Like it's so tiny. 

Jordan: They call it the ideation stage. 

Lauran: Yes, it's, we're teeny tiny and we're, you know, we don't consider us Up with like the big dogs of startups. So for us to get picked for that, it was just really exciting and I'm excited to participate.

Jordan: I was going to say, um, Lauren's not fully telling the story here. She is the, the captain, the CEO of the team and everything. And I just want to say like your leadership skills and your hard work has just been amazing and should be applauded. So 

Lauran: thank you. Round of applause. I hope I'm doing a good job because I just really want to like I want to be a good leader and I hope I'm doing everything that I can to do that.

You are. 

Jordan: You go get it. You get them, big dog. Thank you. Big dogs. All 

Lauran: right, what's your high for the month? 

Jordan: Oh my gosh, my high was just, for me, it was the best. It was. It's getting to see 21 pilots again for the 4th time. 

Lauran: It was Oh no, 

Jordan: for me it's been more than 4 times. I've seen them, I don't even, I don't even know, I can't even count how many times I've, well I probably could, I'd have to think about it, but I've seen them so many times, um, So freaking phenomenal.

That show for the Clancy tour was just chef's kiss. Tyler Joseph is just I love him. I love that man. Josh Dunn is a beast. He's an animal. They're just the dynamic duo. Not Batman and Robin. Batman and Robin. Who? Like, I don't even know them. The dynamic duo is Josh Dunn and Tyler Joseph. 

Lauran: It was a pretty, it was a pretty damn good show.

It 

Jordan: was so good. I just, um, 

Lauran: I enjoy every show. Those are the concerts that I go to, like, because sometimes we'll go to concerts and I'm like, okay, when's this gonna end? Because I love music. You mean like, 

Jordan: you mean like, um, so the show comes out December 3rd. Fourth, but we are recording on October 10th here.

Um, this upcoming Monday on the, or not Monday, Sunday, on the 13th, we're going to see the front bottoms. And are you excited? 

Lauran: So excited. No, 

Jordan: you're not. You can just say you're not excited. 

Lauran: I go with Jordan because he's excited. Yes. So we'll go to shows like that. And I kind of like, I will pull up the set list and be like, all right, three more songs.

But like, 21 Pilots is one band that I literally could watch forever and never get sick of them. For 

Jordan: me, like, And they're 

Lauran: from 

Jordan: Ohio. With them being from Columbus, you know, it just gives us like this like hometown connection and everything, especially the year we saw them down in Columbus at Nationwide.

That was incredible. But I, don't come at me, Skeleton Click. That's the fan base for it. OK, listen, 

Lauran: I love Twenty One Pilots, but I didn't know 

Jordan: that. Don't come at me. I will say they are not the most like they're not intricate music. They're not like the most like. It's not like 

Lauran: Their music's a vibe. It's just a good vibe.

Jordan: It is pop music. I will sit there and say, like, don't hate me. I'm just, I'm being honest. But what I think sets them so much apart, and especially during their live shows, is just the emotional connection that they have, especially with their music and their fan base. 

Yeah. 

I have seen a number of artists at the levels from local band all the way up to, like, top performers like this, and They are in a group all of their own, and the only other artist I have seen from my personal, like, music journey has been Noah Kahn.

That can really connect with his audience and connect with his music emotionally, the way they do. Like, it is just, they're on a different level with that. Like, they, when they get up there, they just, they are amazing. In it and it's just it's so cool to see them live. So 

Lauran: love that. Yeah, that was a really fun really fun concert I I can't wait to see them again the next time.

Oh, 

Jordan: you know as soon as the next tour dates I'm because usually because this is like a world tour So they're probably do a second leg and you know as soon as they announce either a Cleveland Columbus or Pittsburgh date We are getting those tickets Beforehand, I'm, I'm gonna, you know, my life mission now is to find out, like, who their tour manager is, and I'm gonna become BFFs with them, and I'm gonna be like, just give me the tickets, don't, shh, don't worry, I'll pay, I'm good for it, just give it to me before they go insane.

Lauran: Alright, well, while Jordan hunts down Twenty One Pilots tour manager, we will take a quick break and we'll be back with an excellent episode. Adventure.

Okay. Being a teacher, um, obviously our brains went back to, you know, some of us might have experienced in high school. Having to take home an egg to take care of in like, you know, home ec class. You guys got 

Jordan: eggs? 

Lauran: I got a rock. I got a robot baby. Whoa, 

Jordan: hold on. Some of us are getting eggs. I got a rock. Robot baby?

Yeah. Robot baby. It was 

Lauran: a robot baby. 

Jordan: Robot baby? 

Lauran: Robo 

Jordan: baby. 

Lauran: It's tough. Anyway, um, so we thought it would be fun if we put in a Um, to, to chat GPT some scenarios and have it create a game for us where we are trying to take care of an egg and decide different pathways for its life to take. So I'm going to read off.

I do want to 

Jordan: preface this. Yes. We did. We play test this with our amazing producers. And this is just a wild journey. 

Lauran: It is. It's gonna get egg streamly crazy. 

Jordan: I like that one. 

Lauran: Aha! See, that was a good one. 

Jordan: That was shell tastic. Oh, stop. 

Lauran: You're cracking me up. Oh! Okay, so There's 

Jordan: a lot to yolk 

about.

Go, because this is gonna get way off the rails. 

Lauran: Okay, well, um, the first chapter in our adventure is called Chapter 1. The Egg. That knew too much. 

Jordan: Oh, no. What 

Lauran: does 

Jordan: he know? 

Lauran: How 

Jordan: can an egg know too much? He knows too much. He's just starting his journey. He like 

Lauran: You must have witnessed something. 

Jordan: Oh, no, you think like a murder?

Lauran: I don't know. 

Jordan: You think this is now a murder mystery podcast? Maybe somebody got scrambled. Ooh, do you think we can get Bailey Sarian on now? Oh, I'd love that. Because it's a murder mystery. This egg's seen a murder. There's been a murder. 

Lauran: Okay, The Arrival. of Egbert. It was a rainy afternoon when Egbert arrived, not by stork or doorstep, no.

Egbert made its grand entrance by rolling down the street, wearing tiny aviator goggles, and bumping directly into your front door. 

Jordan: Oh my god, I love the fact that they're aviator goggles, like they're like, no they can't be glasses, they're goggles. 

Lauran: Has to be go well, how else would they stick on his head?

Well I know, that's what 

Jordan: they it thought of it, it like, you know what? 

Lauran: AI, you know everything. 

Jordan: Good job, AI. You go chat. 

Lauran: No note, no instructions, just a sense of mystery and the potential for greatness. This egg, Egbert, seemed to possess an unspoken wisdom as if it had seen the world already, despite being perfectly egg shaped and showing no signs of hatching any time soon.

Now, 

Jordan: I'm really glad he's egg shaped for an egg, that's important. 

Lauran: Now, as Egbert's proud new parents, you have your first big decision to make. Egbert needs a nurturing environment, but what kind of upbringing will you provide to help this peculiar egg flourish? 

Jordan: Okay, what are my options? 

Lauran: Okay, option A, you decide to surround Egbert with a constant stream of classical music and obscure philosophy books to nurture its intellect from the shell up, or B, you build Egbert a tiny colorful playground full of odd trinkets and wind up toys hoping to ignite its sense of adventure and curiosity.

Theme: Okay. I don't know. I have an idea. Do we 

Lauran: want him to be a Smart. And not that he wouldn't be smart in the other way, but I was saying, saying, Hey, 

Jordan: hold on a 

Lauran: second. Hold on, hold on. Do we want him to be classically trained? 

Jordan: Mm-Hmm. ? 

Lauran: Or do we want him to be a free thinker? 

Jordan: I was thinking, now this is my idea, so you can give your thoughts and feelings afterwards, but I'm leaning towards classical music.

However, for flavor Text only, Carmina, Barna. 

Lauran: So like his entire life he's only gonna listen to Carmina 

Jordan: Burana? You're the worst. Just that, non stop, 24 7. 

Lauran: Alright, we chose option A. Chapter 2. Egbert. The Philosopher in the Shell. 

Jordan: Ooh, see, I told you Carmina Burana was gonna pay off. That 

Lauran: sounds like, um, The Philosopher's Stone, so maybe Harry 

Jordan: Potter, Harry Potter and the Carmina Burana.

Lauran: Isn't it Carmina, Carmita? Oh, is it? Carmita, I don't know. Anyway, that song. 

Jordan: Isn't it Latin, like I don't know. 

Lauran: Okay, three years have passed since you decided to immerse Egbert in the world of classical music and philosophy. 

Jordan: Yeah. 

Lauran: Beethoven symphonies echoed through the house as tiny post it notes with scribbled quotes from MY EGG.

Okay, I always, I always mispronounce this philosopher's name. Okay. Is it Nietzsche? Netsky. 

Jordan: Oh, isn't it Netsky? I don't know. Netsky. Oh boy. And Plato. 

Lauran: Surround Egbert's resting spot. 

Jordan: I was about to say it's been a minute since like college philosophy, but I think he's a 

Lauran: Russian philosopher. I don't know.

Strangely, Egbert hasn't hatched yet, but you sense that its intellect is growing. On more than one occasion, you've woken up to find a tiny Monocle precariously perched on Egbert's shell. No one knows how it got there. Wait, wait, 

Jordan: he's grown up so fast in one chapter. My, my, my little cool egg with his aviator goggles.

Now he's got a monocle. Is now Mr. Monopoly, man? 

Lauran: What happened? He's Mr. Monopoly! Mr. Monopoly! Oh my gosh. Now, at three years old, Egbert has developed an air of sophistication. This has only happened 

Jordan: in three years. 

Lauran: There's a constant hum of deep thought whenever you're near, but as much as Egbert loves the pursuit of knowledge, you've noticed it's starting to show an interest in something unexpected.

Jordan: Sinister? Murder. It's murder, isn't it? 

Lauran: Decision. 

Jordan: Mmm. 

Lauran: A. Do you choose this? Egbert seems fascinated by the family toaster and watches intently whenever you make toast. Do you indulge this curiosity by giving Egbert full access to the toaster to learn the ways of modern machinery? Oh no! Or B, you notice Egbert spends hours Staring at the stars from its window, do you decide to foster this interest by building Egbert its own miniature telescope?

Oh my gosh, 

Jordan: this is, this 

Lauran: is tough. Okay, this can be tough in two ways. Um, from the first perspective, I want to pick Toaster because it's funny, but also I worry because What do you use to make, er, what do you put in a toaster? 

Jordan: Toast. 

Bread. 

Lauran: Bread, I 

Jordan: know. I know it's bread. And then, 

Lauran: what do you eat with your bread?

Jordan: Um, are you talking me specifically? In the 

Lauran: morning, what do you eat with your toast? 

Jordan: Me? Salmon. 

Lauran: What do you eat with your toast for breakfast? 

Jordan: Cream cheese and salmon. Oh 

Lauran: my god. Eggs. You eat eggs, scrambled or sunny side up. What if? He falls into a pan next to the toaster and our son is dead. 

Jordan: Are you saying he's going to be the murder victim if we pick option one?

Lauran: Maybe we knew too much. 

Jordan: Duh! 

Lauran: I'm going with option one. Option 

Jordan: one. Get that toaster. Get that boy a toaster. 

Lauran: I got the boy a toaster. K Chapter 3. Egbert, Master of Toast Technology. 

Jordan: I didn't know there was a gap in the market for toast technology. There is. I thought we had that pretty figured out. Nope, 

Lauran: nope.

He's bringing up the future of technology with toasters. Except that stupid 

Jordan: dial. I think we need, because I've learned, I've learned, some minutes, that's what the dial means, some level of toastiness. 

Lauran: Or you can just, you know, be bougie and buy the toaster that's like a million dollars that has the pictures of toast on it.

Like how, how, how crispy you want your toast. That is a, 

Jordan: hold on. I am just learning about this new world of toasting and toasters. That's a 

Lauran: thing. 

Jordan: That is a thing? That's 

Lauran: a thing. We've already come to the conclusion that there are tons of kitchen gadgets that we need but don't buy. That's not one we need, but like.

No, 

Jordan: no, no. Hold on. I need that. You tell me. There is a toaster with a graphical user interface that brings up pictures of toast with the level of toastiness. 

Lauran: Yes. 

Jordan: And you can choose that? I'm living in the future. 

Lauran: Okay, chapter three. Six more years have passed and Egbert, still unhatched, has become a connoisseur of toasters.

Not just any toaster, mind you, but a complex artisanal toaster you've had custom built after Egbert's inexplicable obsession grew. Egbert now spends its days experimenting with different settings, temperatures, and bread types, creating what it What it calls the perfect toast. The local news even caught wind of Egbert's innovations, dubbing it the Toast Whisperer.

Jordan: The Toast Whisperer, oh my gosh. 

Lauran: However, it's still just an egg, and people are baffled as to how this egg has achieved such culinary feats without ever cracking its shell. But something strange has begun to happen. You've noticed some of your books and gadgets going missing. 

Jordan: Are you telling me it's the Ghost Toast Whisperer?

Lauran: The ghost host host? Whisper? 

Jordan: The ghost host host? Whisper? 

Lauran: But something, oh sorry, they reappear weeks later. Slightly altered. Improved, even. Oh no. Egbert seems to be tinkering with things. Beyond Toast. A. 

Jordan: I told him. 

Lauran: You encourage Egbert. 

Jordan: Okay. 

Lauran: To explore these strange new talents, hoping it will eventually lead to even more inventive breakthroughs.

You supply it with all sorts of household gadgets to enhance. Enhance. Or B. You worry that Egbert may be delving too deep into uncharted territory so you gently nudge it back toward more normal hobbies like gardening and crossword puzzles. 

Jordan: Okay, 

now listen here. I was fine with the toaster. 

Lauran: But when he starts messing with the PS5, that's when we put our foot down.

Jordan: When I go to grab my beard trimmer to shave my beard. 

Lauran: I thought you said beard trimmer and I was like, what? My 

Jordan: beard trimmer. Oh yeah, let me shave the top off this course. It's too foamy. I need, I need to shave this down here. Yeah, I grabbed my beard trimmer and now it's telling me like, Oh, your temperature today is like, I don't want that Mr.

Beard trimmer. Like, no. And now I'm mad at Egbert. Why? Did you mess with my beard trimmer? I am go I am So you're 

Lauran: saying he's gone a toast too far. He's going 

Jordan: a toast too far. He has now buttered both sides of the bread and is moving on to buttering my refrigerator. 

Lauran: So he might be crispy? He might be burnt to a crisp?

He 

Jordan: is He's He's burnt his I don't know where I'm going with that one. 

Lauran: All right, so we're going with option B, we're gonna nudge him towards gardening. I am 

Jordan: nudging towards gardening. He's gone a shell too far. 

Lauran: Pick up a shovel, Egbert, you're gonna plant a garden. All right, let's see, chapter four, Egbert, the reluctant gardener.

Oh, we broke his spirit, no! Now I feel 

Jordan: bad! 

Lauran: Oh, 

Jordan: I feel terrible! We crushed 

Lauran: his dreams, his toasty little dreams! We crushed his dreams, his toasty little dreams! 

Jordan: Can we write this wrong? I feel, I feel awful. 

Lauran: I don't know. Let's see what the next decision has us do. Ten years have now passed, and despite It's been ten years and we've broken his little egg heart!

Yeah, so he's like 19 now. No! I don't like this! Despite your attempts to guide Egbert toward more normal pursuits such as gardening and crossword puzzles, Egbert has taken to these new hobbies with moderate enthusiasm. You've built a beautiful little greenhouse where Egbert spends his days among bees.

Begonias and petunias, still unhatched, Egbert now sports a tiny gardening hat, don't ask how, and the plants around it seem to flourish in its presence. But one day, while tending to a particularly stubborn tomato plant, Egbert accidentally buried itself in the soil. He buried himself alive?! Wha That 

Jordan: is Hold on, you don't accidentally bury yourself!

Oh no. Oh no! I am burying myself. 

Lauran: The dirt, it's covered my head. When you rushed to dig it out, you discovered that the ground around Egbert had inexplicably sprouted strange glowing mushrooms in perfect geometric patterns. These mushrooms seem, wait what? Run that back. Sprouting. Sprouting, glowing mushrooms in geometric pattern.

Like a, like a mandala of mushrooms. I was about to 

Jordan: say like sacred geometry is just growing everywhere. This egg touches now. Yep. It's an 

egg 

Lauran: God . Okay. They seem to pulse with an energy. Wait, that made you feel a little odd. Something tells you that, despite the wholesome gardening hobby, Egbert is still involved in something far stranger than you anticipated.

He's hiding things from us! No, 

Jordan: what 

Lauran: We caused this! 

Jordan: We made this happen! Are we bad parents? We're bad egg parents. Oh my gosh, we're gonna get an F! You're gonna 

Lauran: say a whole neck? We're gonna get an F! My 4. 0! Big decision. A. You decide to let Egbert explore this new strange gardening talent curious about where it might lead.

But he hates gardening. 

Jordan: I don't want to force this anymore on him. 

Lauran: You even plant more of these glowing mushrooms to see what happens next. Or B, you become concerned that Egbert is meddling with forces beyond your understanding and so you whisk it away to a completely new environment, an isolated cabin in the woods, far from any distractions, not a cabin in the woods.

Jordan: Oh no, Chris Hemsworth can't save us now. 

Lauran: No, I hate that movie by the way, it's one of my least favorite movies of all time. 

Jordan: That movie, no hold on. Stop. You do this every time this movie comes up. That movie is a great movie. It, it did its job. You hate it because it did its job. 

Lauran: No. Okay. It did, but I can, I can, I can appreciate.

Uh, a horror movie that's supposed to be scary and does the job of scaring me. What I don't like is a horror movie that scares me and then disturbs me for the next three decades. I don't like that. You 

Jordan: know, you've watched a lot of other movies. Cabinet in the Woods isn't that scary. I 

Lauran: know, but I think it was the point in my life when I watched it.

I was still young and the, just the scene where all the blood just comes, it's just, I can't, it just bugs me. 

Jordan: Anywho. But you watch The Shining. The Shining has a whole scene where it's the wave of blood. Yeah, 

Lauran: but it's so much gorier. Like, the wave of blood is so unrealistic. Like, this one, they're like, I don't know.

Anyway. Get on, because I digrass. You're 

Jordan: dying grass. I'm 

Lauran: dying grass. Anywho, what decision are we going to make? Are we going to let him explore this talent, or are we going to say no to the cabin? So, 

Jordan: I feel bad, because we told him no once. 

Lauran: Yes. 

Jordan: And now he, he is, he's breaking out of his shell in ways I, I am concerned about.

Lauran: He is ticked off. 

Jordan: He, he is not, he is not okay. So I feel like, I think as much as he doesn't like gardening. If we, if we keep him away from the gardening, and we brush him away, he's gonna, he's gonna resent us. And I don't want this deity egg killing me in my sleep. 

Lauran: Yeah, and also, I'm not cool about the cabin in the woods, so option A it is.

Jordan: Option A it is. 

Lauran: Alright, let's see, what's the next title of our chapter? Chapter 5. Egbert, the mycelium 

Jordan: maestro. Oh, isn't mycelium mushrooms? 

Lauran: I believe so. 

Jordan: He's a mushroom king. He is 

Lauran: a mushroom king. 

Jordan: We're best friends again. 

Lauran: He's a director of mushrooms. 

Jordan: Oh, 

Lauran: another seven years have passed and Egbert's one simple gardening hobby has transformed into something far more.

Mystical, 

Jordan: whimsical, 

Lauran: the glowing mushrooms have spread, creating an entire network of strange bioluminescent fungi around your 

Jordan: home. Bioluminescent fungi? 

Lauran: It's full of, oh, it's covered in bioluminescent algae as a diversion. 

Jordan: I'm sorry, that is one of the best Disney bits ever, I love that one. I love 

Lauran: Moana.

The mushrooms pulse rhythmically, almost as if they have their own heartbeat, and now the entire garden glows faintly at night. That'd be kind of cool. Much to the amazement of your curious neighbors. 

Jordan: Hey, quick question. Yes? Mushrooms. Fruits or vegetables? 

Lauran: Fungi. 

Jordan: Tried to trick you. 

Lauran: Yeah. 

Jordan: You caught me.

Lauran: Egbert, still nestled comfortably in the center of the garden. Oh wait, so he's still buried? 

Jordan: Wait. 

Lauran: He's been buried for seven years? Oh. 

Jordan: Hold on, 

Lauran: wait, we never unburied him? No! We were terrible parents! Is now regarded as some kind of gardening prodigy, or perhaps a cryptic genius of the natural world. It hasn't hatched, but there's something undeniably alive about it.

Birds and small animals gather around the glowing garden in awe. And Egbert's mushrooms have gained notoriety for their inexplicable properties. Some even claim that they can hear the mushrooms whispering ancient secrets. 

Jordan: Oh my gosh, I, uh, I'm, I'm concerned about these mushrooms he's growing, guys. Um, 

Lauran: I know.

I think 

Jordan: we have to have a talk here. What? They seem a little bit more than just normal. Like mushrooms here. 

Lauran: I totally didn't get that until like two seconds ago. I was like, oh, 

Jordan: these are some psychotelic mushrooms this kid's growing. We have to have a talk. Hold on. Okay, 

Lauran: now we're definitely the worst people.

Jordan: First off, he resents us now. He's 

Lauran: been buried for seven years. He's been buried 

Jordan: for seven years. Now he's growing a mushroom like drug kingdom. Like what the heck? 

Lauran: Oh my god. One day while you're harvesting some of the mushrooms, Egbert suddenly begins to vibrate and emit a soft harmonic. Yeah. 

Theme: Harmonic?

Lauran: Harmonic. Harmony! Egbert suddenly begins to vibrate and emit a soft harmonic hum. Something is happening. Oh no. A, you decide to embrace whatever is about to happen. You gather around Egbert and encourage this mysterious energy ready for whatever transformation may be coming. B. Alarmed, you rushed to contain Egbert's energy, wrapping it in layers of protective blankets, fearing that this could be the beginning of something too powerful to control.

Okay, hold on. Hold on. So we went from burying him to smothering him to death. I was about to 

Jordan: say, hold on, wait a minute here. First off, I agree with you. I think that's a metaphor. Number two, this, this egg has proven to be He is a mushroom god. You think some blankets are gonna stop the impending doom he's about to rot on this earth?

Lauran: No. No! I was like, is that rhetorical? Because the answer is no. They're not going to stop it. 

Jordan: You know, I don't have an answer for this, because I feel no matter what I'm choosing right now, I am just a bad parent. So I'm just saying, you know what, Egbert? Wait. Blow up. You, you glow. 

Lauran: If he, if he unleashes mushroom hell on the earth, we don't have to worry about failing home ec.

There will be no home ec to fail. 

Jordan: You are on that 4D chess move. 

Lauran: All right. Are you ready? 

Jordan: Oh gosh. This is The finale. The conclusion. 

Lauran: Chapter six, Egbert, the transcendent 

Jordan: hatchling. With 

Lauran: a deep breath, you step back and allow Egbert's energy to flow freely. The harmonic hum intensifies, vibrating the air around you as the garden pulses with light.

Suddenly, there's a loud crack. The ground beneath Egbert shifts, and slowly, oh so slowly, Egbert's shell begins to splinter. As you watch in awe the pieces of the shell fall away, revealing 

Jordan: Ryan, what is he? What is he? 

Lauran: A small, glowing figure emerges. Egbert is no ordinary creature. Its body is made entirely of softly glowing fungi, intricately woven with delicate threads of bioluminescent mycelium.

It stands about the size of a cat. That's a big egg. With eyes That's 

Jordan: a big egg! 

Lauran: With eyes that shimmer like stars and tiny mushroom caps dotting its head, Egbert looks up at you with a serene, knowing gaze, as if it has finally become what it was always meant to be. Egbert, the mycelium maestro, reaches out with a tiny hand.

Or is it a tendril? And touches the earth. Instantly, the glowing mushrooms around the garden bloom into full, radiant life. The air feels thick with magic, wisdom, and the strange beauty of nature in its most mystical form. You realize now that Egbert wasn't just an egg. It was something much more profound.

A being connected to the mysteries of the universe. And with that realization, Egbert begins to hum a soft melody. The same one that started all of this. The final prologue. Years later, Egbert's garden has grown into a famous sanctuary of glowing life, attracting people from around the world. Some come seeking answers to life's great mysteries, while others simply marvel at the surreal beauty.

Egbert, now fully embraced as a mythical figure, continues to nurture the garden with its quiet wisdom and glowing presence. Though it never speaks, you always know exactly what it's thinking. A subtle, shared understanding between parent and child. And so, Egbert's life story, the egg that knew too much, ends not with an explosion of power or a dramatic transformation, but with a soft, steady glow of a being who had always known its path.

The world, it seems, will never be quite the same again. 

Jordan: I have some thoughts here. 

Lauran: Yes. 

Jordan: Egbert. 

Lauran: Yes. 

Jordan: Lives in a mushroom kingdom. 

Lauran: The mycelium maestro. 

Jordan: Yes. Magical powers, mystical land. 

Lauran: Yes. 

Jordan: Mushroom kingdom. 

Lauran: Yes. 

Jordan: Can lead you on a path because he knows the way. Is he towed? ? 

Theme: Is he towed? 

Jordan: I think we just hatch towed.

Lauran: He is not towed. 

Jordan: He is towed. . He Toad is the size of a cat. Egg. Bird's the side of the size of a cat. He knows the way he can lead you on a path. Toad leaves you on a path. And Mario Kart. Mystical power. Star. Power towed. We, we raised toad. We are the origin story of toad. 

Lauran: Okay, so we aren't terrible parents is what I'm hearing.

Jordan: I wouldn't say that. I mean. We definitely got like a C on that assignment. But it's not an F. It's not an F. Haha. 

Lauran: Listen, I'm pretty proud of raising Toad. 

Jordan: I, I, you know. We made some mistakes. We learned a lot though. Yeah. So I feel like we're, we'll come out of this. 

Lauran: We did the best Yeah. With the, with the information we had at the time.

Jordan: We did. So I'm not, I I do, I I I think we earned that C but you know what? We earned it and we got that C plus, so. 

Lauran: Alright. I, I really enjoyed that story. Yes. I can't wait for the next time that we, you know, play around with our excellent adventure . Oh yeah. Um, but we're gonna take a quick break and we'll be back with your special bonds.

Alright, everybody, welcome back. Welcome, welcome. While we were on break, 

Jordan: I'm excited about this, we 

Lauran: asked AI to create an image of what Egbert would look like after, you know, he or she hatched, um, and I don't think you guys are ready for this, so, 

Jordan: we, we, you were working on this and I, I'm so excited, cause I have it in my mind of what I think he's gonna look like.

Are you ready? I, I am ready, so. 

Lauran: So. Oh my gosh, he's so freaking cute! So I'm gonna describe it for those of you that are listening so you guys can get the full effect and you guys can kind of paint a picture in your head. 

Jordan: Oh, he's like a little, oh, 

I'll let you explain, but he is adorable. 

Lauran: Okay, so, picture, if you will, okay, and 

Jordan: like an oval, egg shaped I'm getting, I'm getting very much like White baby seal.

Lauran: Yeah, it does have the face of a baby seal or even a kitten. Yes. Um, but it has like, it looks like it bumped its noggin. Like it has like a whole bump on its head. It 

Jordan: was when he was coming out of the dirt. He hit a 

Lauran: rock. Oh, probably. And then he's surrounded by all these tiny little glowing mushrooms. But Egbert himself has these like stardusty eyes and then just like Tendrils coming down from his entire body.

He looks like a giant clump of like strings. Yeah. He doesn't really even look like a full figure. 

Jordan: Like it's because of the tendrils and everything like for his more solid, like the body portion of him. He looks like fuzzy, like you could just pet him and he would be like the softest little, like, Bunny ever.

He has 

Lauran: like little flowers popping off of him. And look at how 

Jordan: cute those little like blue star eyes are like they're just out looking like bing like out to the left like you're just like aww I just want to snuggle him. 

Lauran: He almost kind of looks like he has like a cavern under his body so I kind of want to like sit under him like he would be like a cool little tent.

Jordan: He is the all knowing mushroom king so I feel like you would gain all mushroom knowledge by sitting under him. Almost 

Lauran: like you know how like you, Like there are fairy circles. 

Jordan: Yes. He 

Lauran: reminds me of like a fairy tent. Yes, 

Jordan: a fairy tent. He's a 

Lauran: mushroom tent. I love 

Jordan: that. 

Lauran: I love it. 

Jordan: If you want to see what Egbert looks like, do check out the video version of the show, which would be on YouTube.

Yeah, it's gonna be on my 

Lauran: Mrs. William V YouTube channel. Go ahead and check that out. So you can see the image of Eggbert. Um, but now we're gonna go ahead into our segment called Special Bonds. I'm excited about this segment. So this Me too. I love hearing all of your stories. So I put out a post, um, and I asked for some people to send in their stories of special relationships, either that they had, um, with a teacher who was a friend or their own teacher, maybe their parent is a teacher, and really just highlighting like the impact they may have made on their life or maybe just.

Why they demonstrate like the passion for teaching, um, you know, because I'm a teacher. So I like to hear those kinds of things. So today our special bond comes from Anna. So thank you, Anna. Thanks, 

Jordan: Anna. 

Lauran: Um, I'm going to read it and then we'll kind of chit chat about it. All right. So she said, I want to share my seventh and eighth grade Spanish teacher.

She loved the Spanish. The subject and made sure we liked it too. Instead of thousands of worksheets, we would play gimkits or blukits. When we had a big unit, she would have a fun project to do with it. My favorite was when we got to draw our dream houses and label the furniture in Spanish. Every day, we would start with sharing our mood, the day, the time, and the weather.

One memory I have of her was when I asked for a band aid and she gave me two, one to put on and one for after, the next time I washed my hands. I miss her so much and she really made me love that Spanish, or the Spanish language and culture. 

Jordan: Oh, that's so sweet. 

Lauran: I absolutely love that and um, so my family is actually Hispanic and I, you know, I grew up going, To Spanish, you know, in high school, I took four years of Spanish, and I also had a great Spanish teacher.

And it was just the class everyone looked forward to because it was always so fun. And it sounds like your teacher really, you know, made a point to make the lessons engaging and keep you guys interested in in the subject matter. So, you know, kudos to your teacher. 

Jordan: No, I was gonna say, yeah, that that teacher that like, really brings like a subject alive.

I know for me, I'm sure you have one too, but the one that did it the most was, um, I won't say names, but like, my 7th grade science teacher was the one, like, I just remember, because it was all, she kind of, like, that was when it, like, started drifting off more from just, like, you read from a book every day, like, we were doing labs and stuff, and, like, she, she had, like, the most creative labs to teach, like, the topics we were learning about, and then she always made it so fun, and just went the extra mile to, like, interact with us as students, and, like, a more, like, Heartfelt manner that it seems like the Spanish teacher really did for you and I don't know.

You can always 

Lauran: tell the teachers that truly have a passion for what they do. Yeah. Like it's just a dead giveaway because they just put their all into every single lesson. Yeah. And it's just so evident. 

Jordan: Yeah. And it's, that's like really important. 

Lauran: I really love, like, I love the memory that you brought up also, Anna, because how, how tiny and like small of a moment for you to just ask your teacher for a band aid and for you to remember that she gave you two, you know, purposely because you needed one then and then she knew you would need one in the future.

Like that just goes to show the level of care 

Jordan: that she had for her students. Like it's, yeah. 

Lauran: Yeah, she, I wanted to make sure I wasn't misgendering them. Um, but, it just, that, that just goes to show the level of care, and I, I love that that's the memory that you have of her, you know? 

Jordan: No, I, I think that's amazing, because you hear some kids who just have nothing but like bad memories of school, and to have, like, just that one, 

Lauran: That one teacher that sticks with you.

Yeah, that 

Jordan: sticks with you, and, yeah, it's just, I don't know. I just love that story. 

Lauran: Yeah. Thank you so much for sharing that, Anna. If you want to send in a story for us to read on the podcast, we would love to hear it. Please go ahead and send it either to my DMs at mrswooleyinfith on Instagram, or you can also send it to hello at wearefamilies.

com. Findpod. com. 

Jordan: Alright, well, you know, I'm kind of sad here because we're starting to wrap up, but you know what? We started off as strangers, we moved to acquaintances, now I'm, I'm hoping we're friends, maybe even best friends? What do you say? You know, you can tell us if we're best friends, you know, reach out to us, talk to us, we want to hear what you think of the show, um, what you're excited to see, what you like, but hey, what you didn't like, let us know, so, um.

Lauran: Maybe who you want to see us talk to on the show? Yeah, absolutely. Because we're going to have guests. So that would be really helpful to know who you want to see. 

Jordan: So reach out to us in our human content podcast family at human content pods on IG and Tik Tok. 

Lauran: Yay. You guys don't know how many times we had to say that.

That was a 

Jordan: tongue twister, but I did it. 

Lauran: You did it. Also, if you want to watch the full episodes, you can watch them on YouTube on my channel, Mrs. Woolley and 5th. Thanks for listening. We're your hosts, Lauren and Jordan Woolley. 

Jordan: And our executive producers are, guess what? Lauren and Jordan Woolley, but also Aron Korney, Rob Goldman, and Shahnti Brooke.

Lauran: Our editor is Andrew Sims. 

Jordan: Our engineer is Jason Portizo. 

Lauran: And our music is by Omer Ben Zvi. 

Jordan: To learn about our program disclaimer and ethics rules, Policy and submission verifications in licensing terms, I said listening earlier and that was wrong. , go to we are fine pod.com or reach out to us at Hello at we are fine pod.com with any questions or concerns.

Lauran: This podcast discusses sensitive and challenging topics including mental health and personal struggles. If you are in crisis or need someone to talk. If you are one of those two, please reach out to the Suicide Hotline at 988, the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. You are not alone. 

Jordan: We are fine as a human content production.

Lauran: And that is a wrap on episode one! 

Jordan: Yay!

Hey you! 

Lauran: Hey! I love 

Jordan: that shirt you're wearing. And you know what would go great with that shirt? What? A nice big virtual hug. And you can get that by hitting some of these buttons down here. Subscribe, like, comment. We'll give you A big ol virtual hug. 

Lauran: Thank you so much for listening and we will see you guys next Wednesday.

Bye! 

Theme: Bye!