Benedict Scramblebatch: Part 2 Electric Boogaloo

Lauran: On it, scrolled in ink, were two chilling words. Project Batterstorm. 

Jordan: Oh, that sounds ominous. 

Lauran: That sounds awesome. What if they're just gonna drop, like, pancake batter or french toast batter from, like, the sky? Here we are, boys! Three.

That was better. 

Jordan: Fine. It was just okay. You're just disappointed with my clap today. I'm just, I'll go. 

Lauran: I want us to be in sync. I'll go 

Jordan: home. Bye, 

bye, bye. 

Lauran: Is that in sync? 

Jordan: Oh, is that the Backstreet Boys? Yeah, no, I think that is. 

Lauran: I get them confused. Do you guys get the Backstreet Boys and in sync confused?

Because I do. Because I know, like, Backstreet's back, alright! Like that one. And then, like. Um, cause I think Bye Bye Bye was NSYNC because I think that was on the No Strings Attached album. 

Jordan: You're right. Yes, it was. Okay. I had that album growing up. So 

Lauran: did I. 

Jordan: Yes, I did. That was actually one of the first albums.

You wanna know the funny thing about that? Huh? Cause I bought that, I think I bought it at the same time as another album. It was like the first music I ever bought. I bought No Strings Attached and Meteora from Linkin Park at the same time. Talk about, like, two polar ends of the music spectrum in the early 2000s.

You know what album I bought? What's that? 

Lauran: Velvety Pipes of Jerryvol. 

Jordan: That's not funny. That is not funny. 

Lauran: It's, it's from Zootopia, if you don't get the reference. 

Jordan: Yeah, I'm sure people get the reference. 

Lauran: They might not though, because it's a very obscure joke. 

Jordan: But, what you people don't know is the pain of my existence with that joke.

Because you'll go through a phase where you'll just keep asking me, like, hey, do you want to know something? 

Lauran: No, I'll just go, what's that? You go, what? The Velvety Pipes of Jerry Vold. 

Jordan: And you do it. Non stop for like three weeks till I just want to just curl into a ball and strangle myself with the velvety pipes of Jerry Vole.

Lauran: And then I forget about it and then it pops back into my brain like right now. So guess what you're going to get 

to deal with. 

Jordan: So today we're doing the eggcellent adventure series and I'm gonna hop right in so I can avoid this topic anymore Because I don't want to talk about it. 

Lauran: Welcome back 

Jordan: But guess what?

We're doing something different. 

Lauran: Kinda. It's well, 

Jordan: similar. We're doing the eggcellent adventure. But 

Lauran: something Something extra that we extra 

Jordan: we're doing that we haven't done before a squeak wall 

Lauran: a squeak wall. Yeah Why is squeak wall? 

Jordan: Cuz of the velvety pipes of Jerry's wall. 

Lauran: See you do it, too Okay, so if you guys are following along in our eggselent adventures the last time we raised an egg He he followed a life of espionage.

Jordan: Yes, he became 

Lauran: became double o Oh, just egg. I feel like, 

Jordan: no, I feel like 

Lauran: what number would be an egg? 

Jordan: Cause it doesn't. 

Lauran: Oh, okay. Okay. 12. But I want to say double O. It bothers me. Double O 

Jordan: 12. 

Lauran: No, that's not how that works. 

Jordan: It is. 

Lauran: 0012. What, is 

Jordan: MI6 gonna come and gun you down? 

Lauran: Maybe. I 

Jordan: don't know. You decide to do in our fictional universe of eggs, 0012?

Lauran: Yeah. Okay, fine. MGM 

Jordan: is gonna come hunt you down. 12 

Lauran: over easy. 

Jordan: Ooh, I like that one. Okay, 

Lauran: his number is, agent number is 12 over easy. So, we had our, we had agent Benedict Scramblebatch. Fire name, by the way, like couldn't have come up with a better name. And he, he went through a life of espionage and he was just doing his thing as a spy.

He was trying to, um, help put down or like, you know, take down this like secret underground, like breakfast, you know, mastermind group called the Muffin Men only to find out that his agency, Yolk, was. The front for the Muffin Men. Yolk was a joke. 

Jordan: You know, I'm just thinking about that though, like, come on.

The Yolk Agency, that doesn't sound ominous. Like, come on. Of course the Yolk Agency's evil. 

Lauran: It does sound evil. Because you want 

Jordan: to know why? It's a double entendre. 

Lauran: Why? 

Jordan: Because a yolk is like a weight that's carried around your, like, It's like, yeah, like, it's like a workload for animals, like to take one's yolk off is to relieve yourself of stress.

I 

Lauran: learned something new today. I didn't know that. No, I did not. Yeah. 

Jordan: Yeah. That's what it means. So it's a double entendre. Cause it's not really like, Oh, like the yolk of an egg. No, it's the yolk. The weight. They're casting weight on the people of the world, 

Lauran: the breakfast, the breakfast restaurants of the world.

Jordan: Yes. Yes. Agent 12 over easy is here to save the day. 

Lauran: So, anyway, the Muffin Men were this group of, like, global breakfast conspira Conspirists? Is that what it is? Conspira 

Jordan: Conspirators? 

Lauran: Sure. Conspirators. That sounds better. I could 

Jordan: be completely wrong. 

Lauran: That sounds better though, so I'm going to use that one.

Um, and they used Yolk as a cover while secretly controlling bakeries, diners, and brunch menus worldwide. So when Not 

Jordan: Denny's. 

Lauran: All the Denny's. No. That's why they closed down and renovated. They got taken over by Yolk. Okay. So, Benedict Scramblebatch finds this out, and he's like, oh dang, I gotta stop them.

He goes to his headquarters and gets into this massive brawl with The Poacher. 

Jordan: Agent Poacher was 

Lauran: scary. Poacher was scary. Uh, we have an image. We can input image from last, uh, Benedict Scrambled Batch episode here. He kind of, 

Jordan: he kind of for our, uh, auditory listeners, he kind of looks like Jason Statham.

He looks like a thumb in a 

Lauran: suit. He 

Jordan: looks like Jason Statham. 

Lauran: With a 

Jordan: child with grew 

Lauran: and Wolverine like he has a fork attached to his hands. 

Jordan: I think it's a very very good descriptor 

Lauran: Yeah, so yeah exactly that but they got in this big fight and then So in in the end Benedict disappeared into the night and he vanished to join the underground food resistance movement So, uh, last we knew, he was in, well, some say he was in Italy dismantling the Biscotti cartel.

Jordan: The Biscotti cartel. 

Lauran: Others claimed he was in Tokyo exposing the Tamago syndicate. 

Jordan: Not the Tamago syndicate. Is it? 

Lauran: I think it's Tamago. Not the Tamago. Tamago, Tamago. Not the Tamago syndicate. I'm sorry if I'm butchering that, but either one, it sounds, you know, How 

Jordan: could you butcher that? 

Lauran: But he, he wasn't done.

His mission wasn't done. And that's where we left off. 

Jordan: Well, the muffin men were still out there. They 

Lauran: were, and we got to stop them. So. Today we have The Egg Chronicles 2, Benedict Scramblebatch, and The Rise of the Muffin Men. That sounds 

Jordan: like there's gonna be a part three, people. There 

Lauran: might be. Who knows?

Oh my 

Jordan: gosh. 

Lauran: I don't know. But are you ready to get into this mission? 

Jordan: I was going to make a yeast joke and I couldn't think of it. So yes. Oh, 

Lauran: right. 

Jordan: Yeah. 

Lauran: I was like a yeast joke. Where are we going with this? 

Jordan: I was going to say like, let's get yeasty. But I was like, I don't like that. That sounds weird. 

Lauran: No, that sounds, that sounds so gross.

Jordan: That's why I was gonna, that's why at first I was like, oh, I think that's funny. And I was like, that just sounds nasty. 

Lauran: Yeah. Let's all, let's get all glut, gluttonous up in here. I don't know. Gluten. Okay, I'm done. Let's just, let's just dive in. Okay, it's chapter one. A fugitive with a mission. He's a fugitive now?

Jordan: Well, yeah, he went against Yolk. Yolk's still in power. He didn't overthrow Yolk, so he's a 

Lauran: fugitive. 

Jordan: He's being burned. 

Lauran: Oh, okay, okay. Benedict Scramblebatch had gone dark. Ever since exposing Yolk's corruption, he had been on the run. Dodging agents, bounty hunters, and On one particular harrowing occasion, a highly trained squad of gourmet chefs who wanted to turn him into an experimental souffle.

Jordan: Not the souffle. You think Gordon Ramsay was one of those chefs? He 

Lauran: might have been. I think 

Jordan: he was. 

Lauran: Could be. But, the world had bigger problems. The Muffin Men, the true masterminds behind the global breakfast conspiracy, were tightening their grip on the food industry. Benedict had seen their influence creeping into bakeries, brunch menus, and even corporate lunch catering services.

If they weren't stopped, the world wouldn't just be ruled by carbs. It would be enslaved by them. 

Jordan: No. 

Lauran: One night, while hiding out in an underground speakeasy known only as The Toasted Crumb. 

Jordan: Do you think they serve whiskey sours there? 

Lauran: I don't know, maybe. 

Jordan: I feel like it has to be whiskey sours only because it's like the only drink I know with egg in it.

Lauran: Okay, well, he's at the Toasted Crumb. Benedict received a mysterious message delivered by an anonymous source. Meet me at the abandoned flour mill at midnight. The Muffin Men are planning something big, come alone. 

Jordan: Well, you can't go alone. 

Lauran: Yeah, whenever it says come alone, you never go alone. You don't go 

Jordan: alone.

Lauran: Yeah, or if you go alone, you like, alert a whole team of people of your whereabouts and have them hide in the bushes. You don't ever just show up alone. 

Jordan: And if you do, you're a freaking idiot. 

Lauran: It was risky. It could be a trap. It's a trap. It's definitely a trap. 

Jordan: It's Admiral Ackbar level trap there. 

Lauran: But if the Muffin Men were really making their next move, Benedict couldn't afford to ignore it.

What should he do next? Follow the lead. Okay. Okay, go to the abandoned flour mill alone, despite the risk. This could be a setup, but it might also be his best chance to get ahead of the Muffin Men. 

Jordan: That's Bush League now. 

Lauran: Okay, or call in an old ally. Benedict has a few friends still out there. Maybe it's time to consent to contact Shelly the Hard Boiled, a former Yolk agent who might still owe him a favor.

Jordan: Don't you lose your shell when you're hard boiled? 

Lauran: No, you can hard boil an egg, you have to peel off the shell. You have to, you have to peel it though. Maybe they didn't peel off their shell. So mean. 

Jordan: Why? Cause the shell, like you gotta peel off for a hard boiled egg and they're gonna name him Shelly the Hard Boiled Egg.

Lauran: Well, what if he's Okay He's Shelly the hard boiled. Okay, I think it's a 

Jordan: she too. I think I think it's she 

Lauran: no there were no 

Jordan: Oh, there were no genders for it. 

Lauran: No, he just said who still might owe him a favor All right. What are we doing? We're 

Jordan: calling Shelly. 

Lauran: We're calling Shelly. Of course. 

Jordan: We're 

Lauran: calling calling for backup We can't just leave him to fend for himself.

You don't ever go alone. That's like the number one way to die dumb ways to die Do you 

Jordan: think Shelly is Benedict Scramblebatch's like equivalent of a Bond girl 

Lauran: could be or? What if Shelly was a double agent? 

Jordan: That's happened. 

Lauran: No, but I'm saying, what if Shelly is a double agent and really he's gonna call in Shelly, his old friend.

But Shelly works for the Muffin Men now. 

Jordan: It said 

Lauran: former Yolk agent. Okay, 

Jordan: M. Night Shyamalan, watch with those twists here, okay? 

Lauran: Listen, we're getting all twisty up in here. Okay, chapter two, a hard boiled reunion. Benedict didn't trust easily, but if there was one egg in this world who might still have his back Oh, he loved Shelly.

It was Shelly the hard boiled. Once a top tier agent in Yolk, Shelly had been forced into early retirement after a botched mission in the Cereal Isles. 

What? 

Jordan: I wouldn't know what happened! Wait, 

Lauran: but it's Isles? Like, Islands? I S 

Jordan: L E S? I love it! Isles? The Cereal Isles? The 

Lauran: Cereal Isles! I want mine made of Froot Loops.

Rumor had it she had gone off the grid. Oh, it's a girl! 

Jordan: Told ya. 

Lauran: It's a girl. Look, it's a baby. They're, they're a girl. Yeah. So maybe it's love interest. 

Jordan: It's Zendaya. Zendaya plays. It's 

Lauran: Zendaya. Zendaya plays Shelly in the feature film. 

Jordan: Yep. Benedict Cumberbatch obviously is playing Benedict Scramblebatch.

Lauran: And Zendaya. Okay. Rumor had it she had gone off the grid. 

Jordan: Stop. It does not say that. No, 

Lauran: it doesn't. Living in exile somewhere deep in the underground food resistance, Benedict used an old spy frequency to send out a coded message. 

Jordan: Do you think the underground resistance is a bunch of French toast? 

Lauran: Why would it be French toast?

Jordan: Because it's the French underground resistance of food. 

Lauran: Sure. It could be French toast. Whatever your little heart desires, Jordan. He sent out this coded message. It said. The pan is heating up. We need to flip the script. Meet me at the toasted crumb. Hours passed. Then, just as Benedict was starting to think he had been ghosted, a figure slid into the booth across from him.

Shelly was tougher than ever. Her shell was slightly cracked, but battle worn. And she wore a battered trench coat that smelled faintly of cinnamon. Hey! It's battered and cinnamony. Oh God. She's got a French toast trench coat. She does. That's fun to say. 

Jordan: A French toast trench coat. 

Lauran: French toast, oh, that's like a tongue twister.

You've got some nerve reaching out to me, Benny. She said, stirring her espresso. Last I check, wants you on a plate with a side of toast. 

Jordan: Ooooh. 

Lauran: Benedict leaned in. This isn't about yolk. It's bigger. The muffin men are making a move. I need intel. Shelly went quiet. Then, after a long pause, she slid a crumb stained napkin across the table.

How is it crumb stained? I 

Jordan: was just gonna ask that. How is something crumb stained? You know what it is? Do you ever, like, if you eat, like, coffee cake, and you, like, get some, and you don't get it off immediately, all the grease just, like, soaks into the paper? I 

Lauran: guess, yeah, like a grease, but it would be grease stained, not crumb stained.

Whatever, we're getting into the details. Too nitty gritty. On it, scrolled in ink, were two chilling words. Project Batterstorm. 

Jordan: Oh, that sounds ominous. 

Lauran: That sounds awesome. What if they're just gonna drop like, pancake batter or french toast batter from like, the sky? 

Jordan: All over major networks and cities and roads?

Yes. Just to block them all up? 

Lauran: Yes. And then, they're gonna do it in the summer. 

Jordan: So that it bakes? 

Lauran: Yeah! 

Jordan: Oh no! Benedict's 

Lauran: shell went cold. I don't know all the details, Shelley admitted. But whatever it is, they're launching it soon. Some kind of mass scale, car based operation. Benedict had no choice. He needed to stop Project Batterstorm before it was too late.

But how? What should Benedict do now? 

Jordan: What was that in? But how? Not 

Lauran: how. 

Jordan: But how? 

Lauran: That's my ominous. What do we do now? 

Jordan: Is he in the well?

Lauran: Okay. So do we infiltrate a Muffin Men hideout? Shelley has a lead on one of their secret bakeries. If they can break in, they might find blueprints or clues about Project Batterstorm. Or, go straight to the source. The Muffin Men's top enforcer, Crumb Lord, is hosting an exclusive brunch gala tomorrow.

Benedict could disguise himself and get inside. But he'll be deep in enemy territory. Of course we got to meet Crum Lord. We gotta 

Jordan: meet Crum Lord. We can 

Lauran: either sneak into a bakery or we can meet the Crum Lord. What do you want to do? 

Jordan: I want to meet Crum Lord. Are you kidding me? 

Lauran: What would Crum Lord be as an, as a villain in a real movie?

Jordan: Like, who's playing Crumlord? 

Lauran: Yeah, who's gonna be Crumlord? 

Jordan: I was thinking, uh Danny 

Lauran: DeVito. 

Jordan: Oh my god, yes. Before Danny DeVito dies, I want him to take on one serious role. 

Lauran: As Crumlord? 

Jordan: As 

Lauran: Crumlord. I just see him like, wearing Some kind of like, I don't even know why, but I keep picturing him as like a wrestler.

I, him, I, 

Jordan: I was gonna say, I want him in like a general outfit. 

Lauran: No, see, no, no, no. I picture him as like a, some kind of like WE wrestler costume, but just like muffins on his shoulders and then just like crumbs falling all . 

Jordan: No, he needs to be a general, he's the crumb Lord. Yeah. He's wearing like a general, he's got all these just obnoxious.

Pins and everything. They're all muffin 

Lauran: shaped. They're 

Jordan: all muffin shaped. And then his opening line, like it's just the camera pans into this room and everything. Everyone's talking. Then he gets real silent. And then he just goes, Hey, wait, I just started blasting 

Lauran: the crumb Lord. Okay. Chapter three, the brunch gambit.

Benedict knew that if he wanted real answers, he needed to get close to the muffin men's leadership. And there was only one way to do that. Infiltrate the exclusive brunch gala hosted by their most feared enforcer, Crumlord. The problem, the event, was invitation only, and Benedict was the most wanted egg in the breakfast underworld.

Yeah, that seems like kind of a problem. Yeah. Plus, if he's a fugitive, they would know who he is. Luckily, Shelley had a plan. There's a caterer making last minute deliveries to the gala, she explained, sliding an employee roster across the table. You take their place. Get inside and get close to the crumlord.

But be careful, he's got a sharp eye for imposters. And an even sharper bread knife. 

Jordan: Not the bread knife! 

Lauran: Are eggs afraid of bread knives? 

Jordan: I would assume scrambled eggs are. You can cut them up. 

Lauran: Well why would scrambled eggs be afraid, they're already scrambled. 

Jordan: Scrambled eggs? Dead eggs? 

Lauran: Yes. 

Jordan: No! So you're telling me, you got a hard boiled egg Shelly.

She's a hard boiled egg. 

Lauran: Yeah. Okay, 

Jordan: she, 

Lauran: she would be afraid of a bread knife. 

Jordan: So you're telling me scrambled eggs are dead eggs? You mean just an egg just exploded everywhere? Sure. That's so 

Lauran: dark. 

This whole thing is dark. We've got a breakfast underworld. What are you talking about? That's the dark part.

We're dealing with the Crumlord, Jordan! 

Jordan: God, the Crumlord's I'm scared for him. 

Lauran: Benedict suited up, donning a classic white chef's uniform with a tiny apron that read, Kiss the cook. Shelley managed Not the chef, the cook! Kiss the cook! Shelley managed to hack into the guest list. Getting Benedict fake credentials as a high end brunch consultant from Belgium.

A cover so absurdly niche that no one would dare question it. 

Jordan: Crossover universe. His name's Waffles O'Brien. 

Lauran: Oh my god! No! What if Waffles O'Brien joins this? He might. 

Jordan: The Belgian, the Belgian cook, Waffles O'Brien! Oh my god. It's, it's a crossover universe 

Lauran: special! It's too perfect. The gala was held at an opulent, carb fueled mansion where golden croissants glimmered under crystal chandeliers and waiters balanced trays of artisanal scones.

Oh, 

Jordan: now you're making me hungry. 

Lauran: Benedict blended in perfectly, offering critiques on the soufflés. A bit derivative. 

Jordan: No! 

Lauran: Derivative. 

Jordan: Bull crap. 

Lauran: This, this 

is 

Jordan: art. Fam, it's just a scone. 

Lauran: And giving unsolicited opinions on proper quiche density. What is 

Jordan: the proper quiche density? 

Lauran: Fluffy, but not too thick. Then he spotted him, the crumb lord.

The muffin man's top enforcer was towering. His body, a mix of muscle and butter laden dough, his voice, a deep, ominous rumble. Oh, I love that he's towering and we cast him as Danny DeVito. He was speaking in hushed tones with a mysterious figure in a powdered wig. He's 

Jordan: towering. He's 

Lauran: got a powdered wig?

Yeah. Oh my god, 

Jordan: that's perfect. Powdered sugar. And I was gonna say, he's towering in personality. 

Lauran: Okay, there you go. There you go. Okay, so he's talking to this guy in a powdered wig. Um. Oh, gesturing toward a sealed golden envelope on the table. Benedict knew that had to be it, the key to Project Batterstorm.

But how could he get close enough to grab it without blowing his cover? Okay, so how should we proceed? 

Jordan: Oh, gosh. 

Lauran: Do we cause a distraction? By spilling an entire tray of mimosas onto a high ranking muffin man to create chaos, then swipe the envelope in confusion. I like it. 

Jordan: It's a bit basic for us. I feel like we can, we can go harder.

Lauran: Okay. Or you can challenge the Crumlord directly by posing as a food critic and insulting the Crumlord's taste in pastries, provoking him into a confrontation that might give him an opening. Yes! 

Jordan: That one! Make a fool of yourself. 

Lauran: I feel like that's always your favorite choice. It is! Are you kidding me?

And what's funny to me is It's the exact opposite of what you would really do? Yeah. Okay. 

Jordan: No, because see, it's not, it's, it's the exact opposite of what I would do, but it's in that moment, that's what I'm like, I wish I would do this. 

Lauran: You're like, in my head, I'm causing a distraction. But right now, I'm just gonna sit back down.

Jordan: Like, yeah. In real life, I would be like, oh no, okay, I think I'll go back to my seat then. We would be terrible spies. Do you ever think about that? I'd be a. God awful spy. Like, you have to have such, like Just confidence. You gotta walk in the room. Yeah, you gotta walk in the room that you're totally not supposed to be in and act like You're like supposed to be there and sometimes not even that you belong there that you're like the head honcho of the room And you're like, yeah, I run this show even though you don't run this show.

I run this 

Lauran: carton. 

Jordan: Yeah I run a carton sometimes, and I'm like, I don't know what I'm doing, everybody. Chapter 

Lauran: 4, The Pastry Duel. Benedict adjusted his tiny chef's hat and strode confidently toward Crumlord. Termination in every step. 

Jordan: He's still wearing the apron. Yes, he is. Kiss this cook. He's not really hidden as a, uh, what do you call it, uh, he's not really hidden as a critic, uh, food critic.

Lauran: Yeah, like. Would a food critic be wearing all the chef's uniform? He's 

Jordan: undercover. Undercover boss! Undercover boss. There you 

Lauran: go. 

Jordan: Oh my gosh. That should have been our play. Undercover boss. He is Crumlord's boss. 

Lauran: See, this is where I, uh, like, we could, we could have had such a weird spin on that scene. Okay. He cleared his throat loudly.

The room hushed. Excuse me, Benedict denounced. His voice dripping with condescension, but I couldn't help overhearing your so called Expertise on pastries. 

Jordan: Tell me Benedict Cumberbatch would not be the perfect casting for this. 

Lauran: Oh, of course. He's the most condescending He would him as dr. Strange is how I picture Benedict Scramblebatch.

Jordan: No him as Sherlock Holmes 

Lauran: Oh, well, no, but I feel like Doctor Strange is similar. 

Jordan: No, Sherlock Holmes is much more condescending. Is he? Yeah. 

Lauran: I'll have to watch Sherlock Holmes, because I don't think I've ever actually watched him play Sherlock Holmes. Except for in Enola. 

Jordan: He doesn't play him in Sherlock Holmes.

Does he not? No, that's no 

Lauran: that's the that's a different That's a different series altogether. 

Jordan: That's yeah, it's gotta play Superman. 

Lauran: Is it? Dude? I don't know anybody in Hollywood and the 

Jordan: guy that played he plays the Witcher too I just know Danny DeVito and Zendaya starts with an H. I forget his name. I'm blanking on it right now 

Lauran: I don't know.

All right, let's keep going Crumlord turned slowly, his doughy face twitching with irritation. 

Jordan: Once again, perfect casting of Danny DeVito. 

Lauran: And who, exactly, do you think you are? Is that my, that was my best Danny DeVito, I don't know. How do I be Danny DeVito? 

Jordan: Smoke some more cigarettes?

Lauran: Benedict leaned in. Oh, just a humble brunch consultant from Belgium. But I must say, your taste in croissants? He paused for dramatic effect. Embarrassing. Ooh, he got him! Shots fired. A collective gasp rippled through the gala. Glasses clinked. A waiter dropped a macaron in shock. 

Jordan: Well, I liked how you pronounced macaron there.

Thank you. Very. 

Lauran: Very correct? 

Jordan: Yes. 

Lauran: Just so you know, macarons and macaroons are two different things. 

Jordan: Fun fact. The more you know. The 

Lauran: more you know. Crumlord's jaw clenched. You dare insult my pastry prowess? Benedict smirked. I've had gas station danishes with more complexity. Oh, that's an insult. That was it.

Crumlord snapped. Then we settle this. Oh, wait, that was, that was Crumlord. Then we, then we settle this the old way. 

Jordan: What's the old way? I 

Lauran: don't know what the old way is. A silence fell over the room. The guest stepped back, forming a perfect circle around Benedict and Crumlord. A white gloved maitre d stepped forward.

A pastry duel has been declared! 

Jordan: Did she take her glove off and just wave it in the air? Yes, just waved it 

Lauran: in the air. A chef's cart was wheeled in, laden with ingredients. Flour dusted the air. The rules were simple, each duelist had five minutes to craft the perfect pastry. This is the most, like, highbrow, just, fancy pants duel I've ever heard of.

What I like about it 

Jordan: is, it has the air of highbrow to it. It is so trashy. Like, 

Lauran: We're gonna have a pastry duel in the middle of my brunch. Yeah. How dare you insult my croissants. 

Jordan: My croissants. My 

Lauran: croissants. The rule was, were simple. Each duelist had five minutes to craft the perfect pastry. A panel of judges, including a notorious food critic, and a mysterious old woman who smelled of cinnamon and judgment would decide the winner.

What? 

Jordan: Why Ellen Mirren? I don't know. She seems like she would smell like cinnamon and is always just very judgy. 

Lauran: Okay, oh, see, I would cast that person as, um, Oh, I'm blanking on her name. Who plays the Devil Wears Prada? 

Jordan: Meryl Streep? 

Lauran: Yes, I would say Meryl Streep. 

Jordan: Ooh, that is Meryl Streep. No, I think I'm gonna trade in for Meryl Streep.

Yeah, she would smell of 

Lauran: cinnamon and be And she would smell of cinnamon and judgment. 

Jordan: Yeah, she would. No, that is Miranda Priestly. 100 percent. Absolutely better casting. 

Lauran: See, I should be a casting director. 

Jordan: Oh, I think I had three amazing picks so far. And Helen Mirren is not a bad backup. No, 

Lauran: no backup. She is 

Jordan: understudy.

Lauran: If Benedict won, he would earn Crum Lord's respect and maybe even a shot at stealing the golden envelope. So like here, this is like. The envelope is now on the backseat, it's on the back burner, he just wants Crumlord's respect. 

Jordan: What I love about, it seems to be a theme with our eggs. We fail. We fail a lot.

We fail hard. We fail upward. 

Lauran: We failed to the top. If he lost, he'd be banished from brunch society forever. No! The clock started. Crumlord moved like a madman, kneading, folding, and butter basting with terrifying precision. He was crafting a meal fwee? 

Jordan: We need to get a pronunciation on that. 

Lauran: I need a pronunciation.

A meal fwee? It's M I L L E F E U I L L E. That is a French pastry if I've ever heard one. 

Jordan: I don't even know what you're talking about right now. 

Lauran: Uh, I don't even know. Oh, it's like a Napoleon. Oh. Okay, so it's like, it's like a puff pastry and then you have like, like a cream or like a something custard in the inside.

Jordan: Yeah. And 

Lauran: it's layered. 

Jordan: So you got your puff, you got your cream, you got another puff. I 

Lauran: didn't do terrible. 

Jordan: How close were we? 

Lauran: Mille feuille. I learned something new today. Can you tell I've never taken a single French lesson in my entire life? 

Jordan: I, uh, you either got better on your pronunciation or a lot worse.

It 

Lauran: said, for ya. 

Jordan: For ya. 

Lauran: I'm sorry. It's like a real, 

Jordan: really bad Italian accent. For ya. 

Lauran: If you speak French, I'm so sorry. I don't speak French. I speak English and a little conversational Spanish and that's it. 

Jordan: You speak American. 

Lauran: I am American. Okay, so he's making that. I'm just going to call it a Napoleon from now on.

Uh, okay. A puff 

Jordan: pastry Napoleon. Sure, 

Lauran: he's making that. So delicate that even the chandelier held its breath. 

Jordan: Oh my gosh. 

Lauran: This is intense. Benedict had only one shot. What should he bake? 

Jordan: Okay. 

Lauran: A deceptively simple souffle. Elegant. Fragile. And notoriously difficult to perfect. 

Okay. 

If he pulls it off, it will be a devastating flex.

Or A weaponized creme brulee. A perfectly caramelized dessert with a sugar crust so hard that it could double as a I don't even know what that I gotta look up more words! What is it? Shuriken? 

Jordan: Spell it with 

Lauran: your 

Jordan: A shuriken, like a weapon? 

Lauran: Is that a thing? 

Jordan: Yeah, it's like the ninja stars. 

Lauran: Oh, that would be why I don't know what that is!

Why would I know what a ninja star is called? You don't watch Naruto? No. Listen, I learned three new things today. I'm, I'm learning a lot. I learned that yoke is, you know, mentioned as like a weight around your neck. Yeah. Now I learned what a meal for, yeah. 

Jordan: Your pronunciation just, it gets so off the wall, a meal.

Lauran: And then I learned what a shuriken is. 

Jordan: Yes. A shuriken. Okay. I 

Lauran: just want to make sure it wasn't more French. I was going to butcher. So, okay. Okay. 

Jordan: Okay, 

Lauran: so it's the sugar crust on the top of the creme brulee is so hard he could use it to double as a ninja star. Wow. So do we want to make a souffle or creme brulee?

Feeling 

Jordan: the shirk in creme brulee. I was 

Lauran: gonna say, I love me some creme brulee. I do too. So, I was gonna pick creme brulee no matter what you picked, but. 

Jordan: Oh wow, I'm glad my choices matter. 

Lauran: Chapter 5, the weaponized creme brulee gambit. Benedict moved fast. Why is everything a gambit? It's all a gambit. 

Jordan: It's all a gambit.

Lauran: His shell glistening with intensity under the kitchen lights while crumb. Lord meticulously layered his. Napoleon. His. 

Jordan: Napoleon. 

Lauran: Insert, insert other word here. Napoleon. Benedict worked with precision and purpose, crafting what would go down in history as the most dangerous creme brulee ever made. 

Jordan: Oh. My.

God. 

Lauran: With a flick of his spatula, he prepared the delicate custard base, silky smooth, rich, deceptively innocent. 

Jordan: Man, that one, what a creme brulee. 

Lauran: I know, right? 

Jordan: Gosh. Then First you make me want croissants, now I want a creme brulee, like 

Lauran: Then, came the final touch. The brulee crust. Benedict reached for a butane torch.

But no, that wouldn't be enough. Instead, he grabbed a high intensity blowtorch 

Jordan: from 

Lauran: a nearby flambe station, cranking it to its most aggressive setting. So he's just gonna light it on fire. I wish he would've grabbed a flamethrower. That would've been funny. I mean, he essentially did. It's a high intensity 

Jordan: blowtorch.

Isn't, I was just thinking this too, isn't the custard and creme brulee egg based? 

Lauran: I think it is 

Jordan: cannibalistic. A little bit here. 

Lauran: Ballistic eggs. Okay.

The sugar atop the creme brulee caramelized into a near impenetrable layer glistening like a sheet of tempered glass. Benedict had just created the strongest dessert in existence. Okay, but I feel like now we're going to eat it, right? Like, we're gonna 

Jordan: Because isn't that part of the grating of creme brulee?

Is you're supposed to be able to take the back of the spoon, lightly tap it, and it crack? 

Lauran: See, I I don't want it to do that. I want to have to, like, really Really like hammer into that thing. Like I want, I want my creme brulee top. The sugar, caramelized sugar. Yeah. To be like, like, I wanna have like an ice pick and like dig into it.

No, I 

Jordan: think I remember watching like one of those cooking, cooking shows. You're probably right. I'm just saying I don't want that. Yeah. The like, the hallmark of a good crust is, it's supposed to be like fra. It's strong enough that it holds itself together during transportation, but frail enough for you to be able to just take the back of your spoon and lightly crack it.

Lauran: I want with a tap, I want. To ice pick that 

Jordan: bring out a hammer and chisel to get through to your custard. Yeah 

Lauran: I do the judging begins the judges sampled crum lords Napoleon. 

Jordan: No, how do you say that right? Say it, say it with your peas. 

Lauran: Mille fillets. I will never say that right. 

Jordan: You've gone from French to like what sounds like Norwegian at this point now.

Lauran: Guys, I don't 

speak French. I'm sorry. I can't. I can't do it. 

Jordan: Layers 

Lauran: flaked apart perfectly. The pastry practically melted on the tongue. It was exquisite. The crowd whispered Was it exquisite? 

It was exquisite. 

The crowd whispered, Had Benedict miscalculated? Then came his turn. The first judge attempted to crack the brulee crust with a spoon.

Nothing. Not even a dent. A second judge tried tapping it with a fork. The fork bent. The mysterious old woman leaned in, sniffing the dish, a brulee so strong it defies convention. Her wrinkled hand trembled as she declared, This is a revolutionary dessert! Why? It's terrible! No one can eat it! 

Jordan: I was going to say, why would, why would that be a revolutionary dessert that makes no sense?

You can't eat it. You can't taste it. It's just A block of glass at this point. It's 

Lauran: not a dessert anymore. It's not a 

Jordan: dessert. 

Lauran: The crowd erupted. Benedict had won. Crumlord, defeated and humiliated, grudgingly bowed his head. You truly are a master, Benedict Scramblebatch. He knew! As a sign of respect, he pushed the golden envelope toward Benedict.

Take it, but be warned. Once you read what's inside, there's no going back. 

Jordan: My gosh. He 

Lauran: knew the whole time. I 

Jordan: say. 

Lauran: What a twist. 

Jordan: What a twist. 

Lauran: Benedict cracked open the envelope. 

Jordan: I didn't know we were watching Twisters. 

Lauran: Inside was a single sheet of paper. It read, Project Batterstorm Activation. 48 hours. Target entire coffee house industry.

Jordan: Not the coffee. That's evil. That's just evil. 

Lauran: Benedict's shell went cold. If the Muffin Men weren't stopped, the world's supply of coffee pairings, croissants, scones, even the humble biscotti, would fall under their complete control. He had two days to stop them. What's his next move? Go straight for the Muffin Men's headquarters.

It's time to take the fight directly to them. No more sneaking around. Or, gather an elite team of pastry resistance fighters. This mission is too big for one egg. Benedict needs reinforcements. Never go alone. What did we 

Jordan: learn? We learned that lesson one. We 

Lauran: know this. What if we chose to go? 

Jordan: That'd be like us.

You never go alone. 

Lauran: Chapter six, assembling the pastry resistance. Benedict knew one thing for certain. He couldn't take down the Muffin Men alone. If Project Battlestorm was set to launch in 48 hours, he needed a team, a crew of highly specialized food industry operatives who could fight, Bake and think on their feet.

It was time to call in some favors, kay? So, here are his recruits. 

Jordan: Okay. 

Lauran: Obviously, Shelly. 

Jordan: Shelly, okay. The hard boiled. Right. Played by Zendaya. 

Lauran: Right. She's an ex yolk operative, combat specialist, and an expert in tactical omelette maneuvers. So, she's a given. We got Flapjack Jack. 

Jordan: Oh, we gotta give him a better name than Flapjack Jack.

Lauran: Uh I feel like I want him to be like, see, but he's a griddle master. 

Okay. 

But I wish he was like a fighter, cause I would call him like, Flap Smack Jack. Or Flap Jack Smack. I don't know. Flap Jack Mack, how about that? 

Jordan: Flap Jack Mack. 

Lauran: Okay, we got Flap I like that. We're changing his name, Flap Jack Mack. 

Jordan: Flap Jack Mack.

Lauran: Cause we can't call him Flap Jack, that's just 

Jordan: Redundant? Yeah. 

Lauran: He's a former griddle master betrayed by the Muffin Men and left flipping pancakes in exile, the only person who knows how to neutralize industrial grade batter weaponry. Then we have Madame Croissant, a legendary pastry chef turned underground saboteur, specializes in disguises, espionage, and explosive eclairs.

The Bagel Twins. Locks and loaded. Yes! Locks and loaded! I love it! Oh my god, that is amazing! The Bagel Twins locks and loaded. That is insanely great. A pair of ruthless deli mercenaries who once held an entire brunch hostage using nothing but a day old sesame bagel and a well placed schmear of cream cheese.

Jordan: I have never in my life ever heard something so perfect. It's, it's great. It's 

Lauran: great. 

Jordan: Oh my 

Lauran: God. That totally makes up for flapjack Jack. 

Jordan: Totally does. 

Lauran: And last but not least. Dr. Butterworth. 

Jordan: Okay. 

Lauran: A rogue scientist who once worked for the muffin men designing top secret bakery tech. Now he's out for revenge.

Jordan: I don't have a feel on who should play who, but I know the last one. What's his name? Dr. Butterworth. Willem Dafoe. 

Lauran: Okay, I could see that one. 

Jordan: Definitely Willem Dafoe. 

Lauran: Madame Croissant, I feel 

Jordan: I got Sofia Vergara first there. 

Lauran: Yes. 

Jordan: That's what I got first. Sofia 

Lauran: Vergara is Madame Croissant. 

Jordan: Okay. 

Lauran: Even though, like, Madame Croissant would be French, I don't care.

Sofia would be sassy. She's got the range, she 

Jordan: could do it. 

Lauran: I like it. 

Jordan: You know, I think we switch it. It's a Spanish. We'll, we'll make them Spanish. It's a Spanish one. 

Lauran: Senora Croissant. Senora Croissant. There you go. Okay, who's gonna be the Bagel Twins? 

Jordan: Don't know why. Locks and Loaded. I really want Shia LaBeouf to be one of them.

Theme: Wait! He doesn't have a twin! I know! Are we gonna, are we gonna Lindsay Lohan this? Yeah, we can Lindsay Lohan it! Have him film Locks and Loaded? 

Lauran: Okay, so we have, so we have Zendaya, who's Flapjack Mac, why, oh, no, I know who he's gonna be. It's gonna be, um, who's that guy with the big mustache? 

Jordan: They're talking Danny Trejo.

Lauran: Sure, not, I wasn't thinking him, but I like Danny Trejo. So Danny Trejo's gonna be Flapjack Mac. We've got Sofia Vergara as Madame Croissant. We've got LaBeouf as locks and loaded, and then we've got Willem Dafoe as Dr. Butterworth. 

Jordan: Oh my god. 

Lauran: I can't. This 

Jordan: casting is just amazing. This is killing me. 

Lauran: All right, the strategy session.

The newly formed pastry resistance gathered in a dimly lit safe house, a hidden bakery beneath the toasted crumb. Maps, blueprints, and surveillance photos of Muffin Men facilities were pinned to the walls. Shelly leaned forward. The intel from the Golden Envelope says Project Batterstorm is set to launch from an undisclosed industrial bakery.

We need to figure out where before it's too late. Dr. Butterworth adjusted his glasses. Can you do a Willem Dafoe? 

Jordan: There's only one place with the kind of equipment needed for mass 

Lauran: scale 

Jordan: carb control. 

Lauran: I love it. That was the best Willem Dafoe slash 

Jordan: Bernie Sanders I've ever heard. Bernie Sanders. 

Lauran: He pointed to a heavily guarded facility on the map.

The Bakery of 

Jordan: Doom. Not the Bakery of 

Lauran: Doom! Flapjack Mac whistled. I can't do Danny Trejo. 

Jordan: I'm not even going to try. We're not even going to attempt 

Lauran: that one. Nobody's gotten inside that place in years. It's loaded with security scones, laser bagels, and a butter moat. I love security scones! The butter moat!

Theme: Oh god, do you think 

Jordan: it's boiling? That would be extra evil. And then there's little, like, pastry crabs that live in the butter moat. 

Lauran: Yes. Madame Croissant smirked. Sounds like fun. Benedict cracked his knuckles. Then, we go in fast and hot. We have one shot to stop Project Batterstorm before every coffeehouse in the world falls under their control.

How should the team approach the mission? The stealth approach. Madame Croissant leads the team in a covert nighttime infiltration, sneaking past security with disguises and buttery silence. 

It's not going to be the self, the self, no, 

Jordan: we're going in loud. We're making, we're, we're making a boom. All right.

So the full on brunch assault, the full on brunch assault. Are you kidding me? Is that a question? All right. 

Lauran: All right. Loud and fast. I got it. So we're, we're not going to try and play this one smart and be stealthy. When have we got to be 

Jordan: sneaky? 

Lauran: Yeah, we're not. Okay. All right. The great brunch assaults.

Then that's what we're going for. Chapter 7, The Great Brunch Assault. Benedict tightened his spy belt. No time for sneaking, he declared. We hit the bakery of doom hard and fast before they know what's happening. Flapjack Mac cracked his knuckles. I've been waiting years to flip these muffin men. Shelly loaded a buttered magazine into her tactical waffle iron.

Jordan: Hold it, hold it, go back. What was it, Flapjack Max? Line, again. I've been waiting years to flip these muffin men. Okay, you just said it so like, I've been waiting years to flip these muff Okay, do it better. 

Lauran: Do it better. Crack your knu Crack your knuckles. Oh, there we 

Jordan: go. I've been waiting years to flip these muffin men.

Lauran: Shelly loader Loaded? Loaded. Loaded. Shelly loaded a buttered magazine into her tactical waffle iron. Let's scramble them. The pastry resistance piled into an unmarked delivery truck, posing as a catering service. Their fake invoice? High priority brunch delivery for Project Batterstorm executives. Not at all suspicious.

Yeah, 

Jordan: definitely not suspicious. 

Lauran: As they approached the facility, the guards at the gate looked bored. Too bored. Something's off, whispered Madame Croissant. Be ready. The moment the gate lifted, all hell broke loose. The battle of Bakery of Doom. Make an alarm sound.

Okay, that's an awful alarm. All right, the alarm gets shut off. The Muffin Men, the Muffin Men had been expecting them. From the rooftop, dough cannons fired globs of sticky batter. THEY HAVE ARTILLERY! Forcing the team to dodge and weave. Locks and loaded took position behind a bagel cart, returning fire with cream cheese grenades that splattered guards in sticky delicious chaos.

Jordan: Someone's not gonna make it. Someone's not 

Lauran: gonna make it. Madame Croissant flipped through the air, launching precision eclairs at security turrets, jamming their targeting systems with perfectly tempered chocolate. Shelly went hand to hand with a gigantic scone enforcer, deflecting his blows with her cast iron omelette pan.

You go, Shelly! I thought she had a waffle iron. Now she has an omelette pan, too? 

Jordan: Take 

Lauran: multiple weapons 

Jordan: in the batt in the combat. You don't just you don't just go with, like, one thing. You don't put all your eggs in one basket? You don't put all your eggs in one basket! 

Lauran: Alright. Benedict, meanwhile, had one goal.

Get inside and stop stop Project Batterstorm. As he sprinted through the chaos. Oh, I 

Jordan: see. It was all a diversion. 

Lauran: They created a brawl. As a diversion. As he sprinted through the chaos, he spotted Crumlord on a balcony above. Barking orders into a headset. Fire up the Battlestorm Machine! Sorry, Batterstorm Machine!

I was 

Jordan: gonna say, wait, was it Batterstorm? 

Lauran: Fire up the Batterstorm Machine! Crumb Lord roared. The floor rumbled. Something huge was coming online. Benedict grabbed a butter coated zipline, launched himself up to Okay, wait, hold on. If he has a zipline 

Jordan: Why would you butter coat 

Lauran: it? Why would you butter coat it if you want to go up?

You're just gonna go back down. 

Jordan: Smooth escapes. 

Lauran: But not up. 

Jordan: You're taking, you're taking your, He just 

Lauran: goes, yeah. 

Jordan: You're taking your baking to the next level. 

Lauran: I'm taking my bacon. Okay, um, he grabs this butter coated zip line, launching himself up to the control room. He crashed through the window, rolling to his feet as Crumlord turned, gripping a massive rolling pin.

You just don't quit, do you, Scramblebatch? No, I don't. I don't quit. I just flip the odds. 

Jordan: Oh, wait, say that again. You got, you got to get a better, better run on that line. Okay, you do it. Okay. You be Benedict. Let me, let me see. Right here. 

Okay. I don't just quit. I flip the odds. 

Lauran: Why does that sound kind of like 

seductive?

The final battle begins. It's the final battle Okay, so how should benedict fight crum lord, 

okay 

engage in an all out food fight duel grab whatever's in the kitchen flour sugar frying pans and turn the control room into a chaotic battlefield of culinary destruction or use the environment Benedict tries to outsmart Crumlord by luring him into the industrial bread slicer, turning his own weapons against him.

What's the final move? 

Jordan: I like the, the risk and reward of the bread slicer. 

Lauran: I do too. My only question about the first option. Yeah, they're not in the kitchen Are they because he said use everything in the kitchen? So is he gonna like be like hold that thought and then run down to the kitchen grab everything and bring it back?

Are they in the kitchen? 

Jordan: What is the world 

Lauran: but one giant kitchen 

Jordan: one giant kitchen? 

Lauran: Okay, fine All right, the final chapter the slicing Of Crumb Lord. 

Jordan: Ooh, gosh. Alright, 

Lauran: are you ready to do some dialogue? Cause I can't, I can't read all this myself. Okay, 

Jordan: what's, what's, give me some lines. 

Lauran: How about you read for Scrambled Batch?

Jordan: I got all these eggs and no cottons. 

Lauran: The control room shook as Crumb Lord lunged forward, swinging his massive rolling pin with the force of a thousand sundae brunches. 

Jordan: That's gotta hurt if that lands a thousand sundae brunches. 

Lauran: Yeah, I mean I feel pain after one sundae brunch. 

Jordan: Oh gosh, especially with bottomless 

Lauran: mimosas.

Benedict dodged just in time. The pin splintering a nearby countertop. Flower burst into the air, clouding the room in a white haze. Crumlord grinned through the dust. You can't beat me, Scramblebatch. You're just an egg. And I'm a whole bakery. Benedict smirked. 

Jordan: Yeah? Then let's see how you handle a little.

Lauran: Slicing! Ooh, I liked that, that was nice. He backflipped over a conveyor belt, strategically positioning himself in front of the industrial bread slicer, a monstrous machine used for cutting loaves into uniformly perfect slices. Crumb Lord, charged. Rolling pin raised. 

Jordan: Give me a good, what's his charging scream sound like?

Lauran: That's his, that's his charge. 

Yeah, it's, it's a little leedle leedle lee from Patrick, but also just a scream. I feel like it fits. It fits. Okay, okay. It 

Jordan: fits. 

Lauran: At the last second, Benedict ducked and rolled to the side, grabbing a nearby stick of butter and hurling it onto the floor. Crumlord's foot hit the greasy patch and suddenly, gravity betrayed him.

Splat! He slipped. Flailing wildly as he skidded straight onto the conveyor belt. Oh, 

Jordan: gosh! 

Lauran: His eyes widened as he realized where he was headed. The slicer. 

Jordan: The slicer? God! Wait! 

Lauran: Wait! We can talk about! Shink! The blades whirred to life. And Crumlord was no more. Well, mostly. What remained was a perfectly sliced stack of pastry thin Crumlord sections, neatly arranged on a silver tray.

Benedict exhaled, 

Jordan: Now that's a 

clean cut. 

Lauran: The fall of the Muffin Men. With Crumlord sliced, toasted, and metaphorically buttered, the Muffin Men's empire crumbled overnight. The Project Batterstorm machine was destroyed, freeing the coffeehouse industry from its carb based reign of terror. The world could once again enjoy a balanced breakfast without fear.

Benedict walked out of the Bakery of Doom, his team victorious, the rising sun painting the sky golden like the perfect yolk. Shelley clapped him on the shell. Not bad, Benny. Not bad. Flapjack Mack grinned. Okay, gimme your Flapjack Mack. Right? You do the Flapjack voices. Oh, 

Jordan: okay. What do we got here? 

What now?

Gonna retire. Settle down. Maybe open a food truck. 

Lauran: Benedict looked out at the horizon. He knew the truth. There would always be new threats lurking in the shadows of the culinary underworld. Pancake syndicates, espresso cartels. The lurking menace of the Waffle Triads. 

Jordan: Oh, wait, did he, he took down the Boscotti cartel and it got replaced?

The power vacuum caused a new cartel, the Espresso Cartel. Ooh. 

Lauran: Breakfast was never safe. Benedict adjusted his tie. 

Jordan: We'll see, Jack. We'll see. 

Lauran: The end?

Jordan: Could you add any more question to that end? 

Lauran: It's a question mark at the end. 

Jordan: Okay, let me ask you. 

Lauran: Wait, we have some achievements we unlocked. Oh, what did we unlock? Okay, we unlocked Crime Lord Defeated. 

Jordan: Okay. 

Lauran: Oh no, sorry, Crime Lord. Crom Lord Defeated. Well, I mean, he was a crime lord. He was a crime lord.

Crom Lord Defeated. Muffin Men Empire Dismantled, Project Batterstorm Stopped, and Benedict Lives to Fight Another Day. 

Jordan: Okay, I'm calling BS. 

Lauran: What?! 

Jordan: I, I don't think Crumlord is the true head of the Muffin Men. Well, 

Lauran: I agree because if it's that easy to take down your regime, was it ever really a cartel or any kind of underground anything?

Crumlord 

Jordan: was the Definitely a lieutenant. He was not in charge of it all. 

Lauran: So he wasn't a general? 

Jordan: I think, I think they let him fall. They knew, they knew Scramblebatch was getting too close. They knew he would 

Lauran: crumble? 

Jordan: Yeah, they knew he was getting too close. 

Lauran: So it was a diversion. 

Jordan: They gave, they diverted the diversion.

Lauran: Oh my gosh, it just keeps getting deeper and deeper, doesn't it? Yeah, I 

Jordan: don't, I don't believe they're gone. I refuse to believe it. 

Lauran: Okay, well. 

Jordan: They're still lurking. They're still lurking in the shadows. In the holes. Underneath the sink. In the kitchen. 

Lauran: Alright, well, what did you guys think of that sequel to Benedict Scramblebatch?

Um, I'm, I'm gonna, I'm gonna ask it to create an image of this one. I 

Jordan: need to see, 

Lauran: While I do that. You tell 'em where they can tell us of, of their thoughts and comments 

Jordan: if you want. Yeah, if you want to, you want to give us your thoughts and feelings, because that's what I need more in my life is your thoughts and feelings.

You can send them over to Hello at we are fine pod.com or, or you can send them to IG in TikTok at the Human Content Pods accounts, which is at Human Content Pods or. You can catch the full video thematical experience at Mrs. Woolley and 5th on YouTube. And I think that's everything. I think I got them all.

I 

Lauran: think you got them all. All right, so I asked it to generate an image. So it's gonna, it's generating an image. Okay. Of the final battle against Crumlord in the control room capturing That whole moment of when he slips on the butter. Oh, but I 

Jordan: wanted like, like one of those like military photos in front of like the plane or the Blackhawk with the whole crew.

Lauran: Okay, so we'll do this one and then after we film the episode we'll do, uh, one of the entire resistance. 

Jordan: Yes. 

Lauran: So we can get like a team photo. Yes. I love that. Oh my gosh, this picture is epic. 

Jordan: Is it really? Yeah, 

Lauran: so well, it's egg, egg pic. So we got Benedict over here. I like his, his hand is literally detached from his body in the image, but I mean he's looking cool with his like, you know, pinstripe suit on.

Jordan: Yeah. 

Lauran: And then we've just got the crumlord, like, I don't, is he like throwing up an egg? 

Jordan: Probably got hit in the gut and he's just. Okay, so 

Lauran: he's throwing up an egg as Benedict is like about to kick his butt into the 

Jordan: slicer. He knows he lost, that's why. I 

Lauran: like his glasses though, like those are some cool shades.

He does. He's stylish. 

Jordan: Alright, well I 

Lauran: hope you guys enjoyed that episode. Um, we had a lot of fun making a sequel to The Next Scramble Badge. I was, I'm, that was one of my favorite eggcellent adventures that we've done. That was a fun one. Yeah. They're always fun. They are. Thank you guys so much for listening.

We hope you guys loved this. Um, if you did, please let us know what kind of adventures you want us to send our eggs on the next time. And we have lots of other fun games that we're going to be playing. We have other 

Jordan: games. We got, uh, Past to the Future. Mm hmm. Which where we Mess around with history. We definitely don't go on off the rails with history.

Not at 

Lauran: all And then we also have the escape womb escape where it's kind of like dungeons and dragons meets adulting 

Jordan: Meets escape room meets 

Lauran: escape rooms. Yeah, um, and we get pretty chaotic with those two So if you like chaos 

Jordan: is the general 

Lauran: if you like fun adventures Hang out with us, you'll like, you'll like the rest of our episodes.

Uh, but, anywho, we're your hosts, Lauren and Jordan Mouley. 

Jordan: This show has been executive produced by Lauren and Jordan Mouley, Aaron Courtney, Rob Goldman, and Shanti Brooke. Our editor 

Lauran: is Andrew 

Jordan: Sims. Our engineer is Jason Portizzo. 

Lauran: And our music is by Omer Bensby. 

Jordan: But if you want to learn about our program disclaimers and ethic policy.

and submission verification and licensing term, you should go to wearefinepod. com or reach out to us at hello at wearefinepod. com with any questions or concerns. 

Lauran: I love that you make all of that singular because it's licensing terms. And you say term. One term. Oh. Or ethics policy, and you say ethic. One single ethic.

Yeah. 

Jordan: Our ethic. Just be cool. 

Lauran: Yeah. 

Jordan: Just be cool. 

Lauran: We Are Fine is a human content production. Scramble Batch will be back. 

Jordan: And I know you're still out there. Muffin man, we're coming for you. 

Lauran: Yeah, you didn't fool us Or did you?

Theme: Bye

Hey you! I love that shirt you're wearing. And you know what would go great with that shirt? What? A nice big virtual hug. And you can get that by hitting some of these buttons down here. Subscribe, like, comment, we'll give you a big ol virtual hug. 

Lauran: Thank you so much for listening and we will see you guys next Wednesday.

Bye! Bye!